-tiingg`tiinggx.charriis

2006-08-18T03:34:00.000+08:00

RELINK :)

http://tiinggx-charriis.blogspot.com

THANK YOU! =)

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2006-08-16T13:14:00.000+08:00

i tot i will not post any entry today cos i tot that today will be another 'as-per-normal' day for me..
but yay, i am wrong =x
today is another fulfilling day for me!
frankly speaking, i lurve my today, thou its kinda physical challenging..
as in, i am duper tired today!

woke up early due to the early cg.
to tik abt it, its a blessing that the cg was held at 12pm.
aes released at 11am today!
thats the advantage of a catholic skool, they have such thing as 'founder day'
oh well.. interesting~
oh ya, y did i say its a blessing?
simply bcos of my tight schedule..

the cg was a lively one..
personally, i tik that its fun..
hehes.
i tik sitong is reali cute lar..
to say the truth, i am reali glad to see jiawan being so excited today..
lols.
not that she is always dead in cg lar, but it jus feel good to see her participating =)
heys, jiawan, u have alot of potential ! and yups, u have the ability to make my day =)
not forgetting my darling sheep, wanling..
always open her hse for cg.
so hospitable..
thank God for ya =)

praise God, my grp have one convert today!
she is a good convert =)
omg, can u see the revival coming?
history makers on the making!
let me count...
we have ard 11 ppl in AES alone le..
gals only..
cool mann!
TWENTY FOR JESUS, its possible..
if everyone retained, we still have 5 more to go to see TWENTY =)
weee` so visible!
alright, jia you gals!

met up with dan today..
argh, tell u i am so BLUR lehs.
if he has long hair, i guess he will be pulling his hair already.
lols.
hais, i was saying, if not for all these carelessness, MAYBE i can get A1 already.
wahahaha.
sound so crap but its quite true thou.
lols.

so envious..
when i read those blogs with chim eng and beautiful sentences, i cant help but to envy lehs.
i seriously tik that eng is so beautiful..
how i wish i can be one of them mann..
actually it do make a great diff if we are sent to good primary schools or neighbourhood schools..
the influence are so different..
argh, i promise, if ever i have a kid, i will definalty sent them to good schools..
so that they will grow up to be someone educated and speak good and beautiful eng..
so class...
unlike the influences frm neighbourhood skools, singlish, vulgarities etc etc.
ppl who tik that vulgarities is cool, u are so wrong mann, it sound reali aweful.
and its so not elegant and polite.
okay okay, i am frm neighbourhood skool too.
however, it has its positive side lar =)

yea yea.
so by nature, ting is super attacted to ppl who has good educated, mother tougue is english, can write beautiful essays, their lame jokes is in eng version, use very different words to describe common stuffs, come frm well-known schools,stays in condo, etc etc.. alright, these are typicals rich familes with good family backgrounds ; high social status =) and of cos bubbly =)
however, these are e ppl that ting felt so uneasy and inadequate but 'looking forward' to be with.
lols.

okay, dreaming~

ok thats all for my craps.
not that i look down on ppl who are not lidat, jus that i am so envious of those ppl!!
lols

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2006-08-15T02:05:00.000+08:00

ting is officially a member of bookworm club!
wahahas.
have been mugging these few days..
mug and mug and mug.
call me a mugger!

anyway, i seriously hope that it will be a prodictive one.
argh, i am so scared!
i am doing maths in a turtle speed.
omg, save me!

let me tell u how crazy we are..
we studied frm 11pm - 5plus am in macs.
for me, this is e 3rd time already..
and and and, ytd today and tml, i will be meeting ppl up to study.
to say the truth, i feel kinda good. wahahas.

God, help me to be effective!
i dun wana waste my time.
no more.

i am damn busy this week.
cool !
my schedule is fully packed already.
no more space for one more event or activity.
hehes.
cool !

TWENTY for Jesus in far north west TWo=)

-if god brought u to it, he will bring u thru it-
-jesus is my hope-

i am glad that the ppl are responding..
revival is coming, its happening.
=)

ting is having O level eng oral on thurs.
scary.....
1. i duno yung ching sec, so scared to lost my way!
2. God knows how long since i have touch eng.
3. cos e questions and topic of oral are so impromptu, i cant help but to be scared. hahaas.

i thank God, ziying is meeting me on wed to help me !!
yeah, kinda funny to practice oral with her..
but i reali appreciate it!
THANKS SHEPHERD =)

2006-08-14T02:16:00.000+08:00

oh btw..

FNW2 is heading towards 20 TWENTY for end august =)

yeah...

a faith-filled goal.

its very visible.

fyi, we have officially splitted our cg into TWO!

our vision is, we wana see every skools in bt panjang to have a CG!

and one unit in AES ! =)

history makers!

yeah. =)

excited ehs!

chanting 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20..

caught the spirit?

TWENTY MUST COME TO PASS BY END AUG =)

come on, lets work hard for this.

until and unless everyone get their bums up and be united in this, this wouldnt be done, 20 will jus be a day-dream thing.

alright?

charing towards 20.

in jesus name.

--- --- --- ---

ting is repenting..

i wana lead a transformed life.

forgiven sinner.

Real people. Real questions. Real answers. Share what you know.

2006-08-14T02:05:00.000+08:00

this poor blog had been neglected for many many days.
dun bother to update cos this is a public blog, thats e fact.
bid goodbye to my last week. it totally sucks.
not abt wats happening ard me, but in me.
God knows wad happen to me, i duno either.
thats e dumbest part =x i guess....

My last week

got kinda emo these few days.
cried for so many days.
and i seriously wonder y am i crying and wad am i crying for...
the conclusion made is ting have to be more sensitive to herself.
cos she nv noe wats going on with her, and with this, she dun even noe wat to deal with in her life.
thats so pathetic of her..
holy spirit, have i been neglecting u in my life?
oh well, thats e worse thing that can happen to one's life.
ting wana be more sensitive to the spirit.

when a person got emo, many idiotic tots will run thru his or her mind.
i got so sensitive that it seems like everyone on earth is hurting me..
hai ya, to tik abt it, so dumb.
it seems like i am the most pathetic person on earth..
too indulged in my own world that i forgot abt the goodness of God.
wad exactly happen?
discouragements? disappointments? felt left out? unloved? lonely? useless? irritated?
argh, ask me not, cos i am not very sure either.

there's a temptation of dwelling..
to live in my own world, to indulged in this pain that causes unnesessary waters to flow frm my eyes and lead to unnesessary headache e next day.
is dwelling so attractive? y on earth did i got myself tempted over this?
ask me not again, cos the ans is simply 'duhh' ---dumbness.

---

now roughly got how did i lead my life the previous week?
is that agreeable that it totally sucks?
hur hur hur..
hais.
i nearly harden my heart and disobey God.
wad have i gotten myself into..
thank God i have chosen to do the right thing.
i didnt submit to my feelings, i bite my lips and obeyed despite personal feelings.
all thanks to holy spirit =)
if i had harden den, this will be another sucky week for me.
wooo, i am out of that hell on earth.

went to service... it was a refreshing one..
i cant deny that God simply cares.
its always when i tot that i am e only one left on planet earth, God prove me wrong..
no matter wad, i have God with me..
i am so glad that i am proven wrong..
cos this feeling is fantastic!
bleghs =)
was so charged up...
frankly, giving up has nv nv came across my mind..
i mean in both my relationship woth God and my grp.
i nv wana give up, cos i noe wat's instore for me.
i wouldnt felt so terrible jus bcos my grp is not growing lar..
i felt terrible not cos of growth, instead, due to some other personal and dumb reasons =]

the core team meet was awesome.
too bad that jia hui they all nv attend.
hais.
but for me, it was a refreshing one =)

the tingting now is feeling much better..
frankly, i still feel abit uncomfy in my heart..
when ppl feel nevious, they use "butterfly in the stomach" to describe how they feel..
so wad abt ppl like me?
mayb i can use "bees in ting's heart" ?
nahz, craps.
God, i promis, i will deal with myself together with ya.
i wana be a better ting for u.
its time to get out and not be so insecure anymore.
no more dwelling.
no more crying.
stop---

God, help me to find that passionate and joyful ting =)
God, i am nth without u.
nv nv nv nv will i wan to get u out of my life and nv nv nv will i wana get out of ur presence.
cos i need u.

real character is not proven in smooth times, but rather, in the rocky periods.
God, continue to mould me =)

thank God for pulling me up when i am down.
thank God for reminding me for obeying despite lousy feelings..
thank god that i've made e right choice..
pheeeeww~

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2006-08-03T03:21:00.000+08:00

ting blive with all her heart that she will learn a precious lesson when there are obstacles along the path..
and indeed, she've learn one precious lesson =)
ting wants to be faithful in every little things that e lord has entrusted her..
she responded last night and yups, ting did wat she should do today =)
clap clap !!
ting went down to every details, smses after smses... calls after calls..
making sure if the NBs are being follow-up, ppl will come for cg etc etc etc...
b4 everything, expectations are already there in her heart..

oh well, when there are expectations, it makes our heart to be vulnerable to disappointments..
hmmms, get things right, i am talking abt expectations frm human..
cos if u expects frm God, i am very sure that god wun disappoint u, cos thats one of his promises to his children =)
was reali on my nerves today..
however, God clamed me down and i tot thru..
and y on earth did i expect ppl to mit my own expectations?
we are doing God;s work..
as long as its according to his word, and we do not compromise his word..
i guess its perfectly alright to do things in a different way.
however, in God's work, there are still some expectations that has to be met..
this cannot compromise..
so, i am pretty dumb to be on nerve today..
hahahas.

to say the truth, i am very afraid that one day, i will be drained out..
ting doesnt noe wat will happen next..
i am very afraid of problems and circumstances..
yes, i noe that they are the stepping stones to success and the making of miracles..
however, they are just too scary.. i guess.
little little obstacles are showing themselves out as i was walking..
ting has to be courageous and understand e simple fact that she will nv walk alone =)
God, i have to trust u... yea? =)

i am reali concern abt this cg that God has entrusted me..
i reali wana ask for e commitments of e ppl..
hey ppl, if u are reading this..
pls take ownership of this cg..
it doesnt belong to me alone right?
if e NBs dun wana join us, den we go to them..
dun be too passive alright?
we have to go to them and make sure they are retained!!
if everyone only concern abt themselves, den i guess, thats too selfish and inward looking already.
i am giving my best, wat abt u?

ting sat down and prayed for our ppl..
the burden is jus there, right in my heart..
prayed for every single one..
may the lord refresh them and keep them strong =)
likewise to myself.
i am not yet tired, this prayer is just immunisation..
bleghs =p

ting is still believing..
God has many great things instored for me..
obstacles are not meant to hinder us, its there for us to learn and grow up.
if i dun allow it to be a hinderance, it would nv be =)
my heart is trusting that if god is for me, who can be against me?
and i am believing that, if i have given my best, God wun short change me..
if i have not given my best, den i will jus shut up and forfeit myself frm God's blessing.

ah well, its time to slp and...

God, bless e cg tml =)

may it be fruitful and God, u will speak to them..

ppl will come, tutions or wadever to be cancelled..

God, i reali want them to join us..

how can i feel nth when my family member is missing?

God, pls help us!

hur, i wun give up.

i gotta faith that some time down the road, everyone will be stronger..

stay rooted to his word.. and we can turn the earth up-side down..

stay tune and see how the lord is going to bless FNW2 and it will be that kinda too much that we cant contained.

wahahahas.

not self-comforting.. this is my conviction.

nights =)

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-08-02T03:39:00.000+08:00

DOUBLE POSTINGS

Zacchaeus the Tax Collector

1Jesus entered Jericho and was passing through.

2A man was there by the name of Zacchaeus; he was a chief tax collector and was wealthy.

3He wanted to see who Jesus was, but being a short man he could not, because of the crowd.

4So he ran ahead and climbed a sycamore-fig tree to see him, since Jesus was coming that way.

5When Jesus reached the spot, he looked up and said to him, "Zacchaeus, come down immediately. I must stay at your house today."

6So he came down at once and welcomed him gladly.

7All the people saw this and began to mutter, "He has gone to be the guest of a 'sinner.' "

8But Zacchaeus stood up and said to the Lord, "Look, Lord! Here and now I give half of my possessions to the poor, and if I have cheated anybody out of anything, I will pay back four times the amount."

9Jesus said to him, "Today salvation has come to this house, because this man, too, is a son of Abraham.

10For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost."

am i as desparate and passionate when it comes to God's word and work?

did i went of of my comfort zone for jesus?

(3He wanted to see who Jesus was, but being a short man he could not, because of the crowd. 4So he ran ahead and climbed a sycamore-fig tree to see him, since Jesus was coming that way. )

+++

The Parable of the Ten Minas

11While they were listening to this, he went on to tell them a parable, because he was near Jerusalem and the people thought that the kingdom of God was going to appear at once.

12He said: "A man of noble birth went to a distant country to have himself appointed king and then to return.

13So he called ten of his servants and gave them ten minas.^[a]'Put this money to work,' he said, 'until I come back.'

14"But his subjects hated him and sent a delegation after him to say, 'We don't want this man to be our king.'

15"He was made king, however, and returned home. Then he sent for the servants to whom he had given the money, in order to find out what they had gained with it.

16"The first one came and said, 'Sir, your mina has earned ten more.'

17" 'Well done, my good servant!' his master replied. 'Because you have been trustworthy in a very small matter, take charge of ten cities.'

18"The second came and said, 'Sir, your mina has earned five more.'

19"His master answered, 'You take charge of five cities.'

20"Then another servant came and said, 'Sir, here is your mina; I have kept it laid away in a piece of cloth.

21I was afraid of you, because you are a hard man. You take out what you did not put in and reap what you did not sow.'

22"His master replied, 'I will judge you by your own words, you wicked servant! You knew, did you, that I am a hard man, taking out what I did not put in, and reaping what I did not sow?

23Why then didn't you put my money on deposit, so that when I came back, I could have collected it with interest?'

24"Then he said to those standing by, 'Take his mina away from him and give it to the one who has ten minas.'

25" 'Sir,' they said, 'he already has ten!'

26"He replied, 'I tell you that to everyone who has, more will be given, but as for the one who has nothing, even what he has will be taken away.

27But those enemies of mine who did not want me to be king over thembring them here and kill them in front of me."

am i faithful in wat e lord has entrusted me?

will the lord entrust me more in future?

will i be called the "good and faithful servant or the "wicked and lazy servant"?

(16"The first one came and said, 'Sir, your mina has earned ten more.'

17" 'Well done, my good servant!' his master replied. 'Because you have been trustworthy in a very small matter, take charge of ten cities.'

18"The second came and said, 'Sir, your mina has earned five more.'

19"His master answered, 'You take charge of five cities.'

20"Then another servant came and said, 'Sir, here is your mina; I have kept it laid away in a piece of cloth.

21I was afraid of you, because you are a hard man. You take out what you did not put in and reap what you did not sow.'

22"His master replied, 'I will judge you by your own words, you wicked servant! You knew, did you, that I am a hard man, taking out what I did not put in, and reaping what I did not sow?

24"Then he said to those standing by, 'Take his mina away from him and give it to the one who has ten minas.'

25" 'Sir,' they said, 'he already has ten!'

26"He replied, 'I tell you that to everyone who has, more will be given, but as for the one who has nothing, even what he has will be taken away)

+++

is my heart too harden to respond?

am i a good follower of christ?

am i a good leader?

+++

ting did some reflections..

and argh.

i want to be a better person for jesus, jesus deserve a better me =)

God, thanks for ur reminder.

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2006-08-02T02:45:00.000+08:00

ramdon questions..

can love God and yet not serve meh?
how is that possible?
its not logical to say that u love God when u are not serving.. =)

wat exactly does tingting wants?
wats the best for tingting?
Jesus is my capable guide.

there are somethings that i need to do, i have to do and i should do..
but nth has been done...
and i detest myself for being lidat.
some decision have to be made.
=)

2006-08-01T00:04:00.000+08:00

as some of us noe... there is abit changes in west A ..
hehehes...
we will come together with north B and our unit name will be FAR NORTH WEST..
so frm now on, west A and north B wun exist anymore.. hehes...

let me do some introduction..

ting's unit will be...
far north west!!

ting's cg will be..
far north west 2
FNW2

ting's shepherd will be..
ZIYING!!

ting's new sheep will be...
jia hui,wanling and mingyee.
plus jes and phoebe..

ting's dmm mates will be..
jogina,himyi,david,joyce and ziying =)

yeah, so cool !!
i lurve my cg name, so unique..
hahahas.
far north west 2.. wah!

2006-07-30T02:24:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BELOVED EELEE =)

yeah...
time can fly!
i still rmber when u 1st took over west was ard ur bdae too!
and we gave u that pink bag.. hahahas.
anyway.... it has been a joy serving God with ya..
=)

eelee i love you!
thanks for everything and thanks for being my fren =)
i love to hang out with ya and i feel secured sharing my weaknesses to u..
cos i noe that u are one person that god place in my life to guide me !!
yay, thanks for being part of my life and i appreciate it alot !
frm my dad's issue to my o level, to my DAE days to my grp's lowest peak times and to my recent breakthru in accounting and to now...
thanks for being there for me =)
yay.

duno wat to say thou.
if i continue on.. goosebumps will appear mann.
wahahas.
anyway, thanks a million =)

happy 2_th birthday!
wahahahs. =)

2006-07-29T00:36:00.000+08:00

how does it feels like when u are doing something so that ppl can enjoy it and end up treated like a plague?
effort, extra miles and many more are not absence..
i feel so injustice.
try putting urself in other's shoe.
u will see how ugly u are when u point ur finger without understanding wats going on.

2006-07-28T12:48:00.000+08:00

another post for today..
there is alot of "God, u must help me" in my mind now..
however, i doubt that i have given my best in wadever i did this week.

in jesus name, i pray that my cg's new structure will advance ur kingdom.

BBQ!
now i truely understand...
its a hassle to prepare this mann.
guys and gals... pls get all ur ppl down for this!
its impt, its an attraction for ppl to come down for closets.
its a by hook or by crook thing, cannot say no!
bleghs =)
after so much efford putting in, Jesus, help us to see fruits!

CLOSETS!
i am glad that there will be 2 visitors coming down =)
however, its not confrim yet.
so so so, currently we hit 11.
still dun understand y so little.
lets work harder!
=)

oh well...
these are the concerns i had ytd..
wahahas.
there are many more thou..
sometimes i reali wonder...
am i a good leader?
yups, of cos i noe that i am not perfect..
but i reali wana be a better me as a leader.

okay, thats abt it.
tml's closet.
gonna do well =)
my future of west a 2, its all in God's hand.
amen =)

2006-07-27T13:13:00.000+08:00

ting is frustrated by her irresponsibleness!
argh!
it took 3 days for me to realised that..
i am sorry =(
hais, mayb ting should jus stop eating her antibiotic..
should jus allow the bacteria to infect her heart..
i am reali remorseful of how irresponsible i am!

oh well, i sound abit exaggerating..
ok *deep breath and count" 12345678910!
self-condemnation and dwelling stop here.

ting shall move on and be more responsible. =)

2006-07-24T12:11:00.000+08:00

i am feeling reali terrible..
argh.
my temp is going up and down..
my throat reali hurts.
i am pretty sure that i can slim down after this.
wahahas.
let me tell u why..

sat- i ate "kuey sup" (duno how to spell)
-- thats all..
sun- i drank a bowl of soup..
-- thats all..
today- haben ate anything yet..
--

so.. how to not slim down?
wahahahas.
i have difficulties in eating and drinking mann.
yucks.
gonna see doc later..
argh, i wana be healed!
thankiew Jesus!

i am very thankful to jes and jiahui..
they actually planned out the cg roles for me ytd!
wahahas.
cos they knew that i am very sick and yups, i was so touch when i receive their calls.
wahahas.
jes and jia hui..
thanks a million.
i reali appreciate for wat u have done!
lurve ya =)

2006-07-22T23:38:00.000+08:00

knowing jesus is the best thing that can ever happen to me..
its my greatest gift in life that i am given a chance to serve him, to love him and also, to noe this wonderful God that love me dearly =)
God i am jus dumbfounded..
argh, this is the best thing in life..
there is no other better deal den to invest my life into ur kingdom..
there is no better way to experience wats love all abt.
thankiew for everything =)

ting had fever again!
and the temp keep increasing..
scary!
hais, i feel so bad abt jus now..
i tik i complain too much!
keep complaining tat i am cold.
i shouldnt do that =(
sorry God!!
not gentle in spirit!
cannot mann`

2006-07-21T17:48:00.000+08:00

argh, today is a lazy day for me..
feel like staying at home and do nth.
wahahahas.

ytd went to Je to do maths..
hmmms, i reali hope that all the time that i use for doing maths will be useful.. =)
last nite, it was a very divine nite for me.
holy spirit chit-chatted with me.
and i tell u, when holy spirit chit chat with ya, tears will flow unknowingly..
i am just too touch by him..
before i fall asleep...
holy spirit made me sit down and rmber y i do wat i do..
is it jus a routine?

and as i was thinking wat i have been doing..
i am asking myself y am i doing all these?
the great commission, love of God blah blah blah
jus went thru my mind..
i am thinking, in the eyes of the world...
wat i have been doing is quite dumb isnt it?
y on earth would i use my time on outreaching, cg...
y is it my life is revolve ard ppl and ministy..
y did i invest my emotions, my youth to this?
and worldly ppl claim that all these are jus so meaningless...
so is that true?
yups, these are wat i ask the holy spirit..
i dun reali noe wat he thinks after all these questions are 'bombarded' to him..
its like, not that i duno the values of doing all these...
however, since he made me sit down and reali ponder, den i reali start digging everything and i want to renew this passion again by being convicted y i do wat i do all over again =)

and guess wat?
his answer jus warmth my heart...
i was reminded that being is more impt den doings..
the things that i have been doing can be quite dumb if i focus on the 'doings' more den the 'beings'
and also, holy spirit reminded me wat i have learn in hope sem, ministry is the result of love, not e other way round.
if the love of god jus flood u, its very natural to do his work!
and mind u, doing his work is not jus to repay wat he has done for u, cos nv will we come to a point that we can repay wat he has done.
so i ask holy spirit...
so coming to noe u is more den jus investing my life into ur kingdom right?
and yups, its more den that.coming to noe God is more den the doings!!
coming to noe jesus means i am knowing wat is love, wat i joy, wat is peace..
to noe jesus is abt being saved and forgiven..
to noe jesus, i will find a listener and a fren that understands me thru`ly..
coming to noe jesus means i can walk in the light and wun live in comdemnation anymore.
to noe jesus is thay i can bid goodbye to my ugly past.
and the list goes on...

and yes, we are given a chance to noe this God is our privillege..
and we are supposed to go begging in order to have this privillege,
however, it was given to us freely..
and many ppl jus dun appreciate it.
some rejected him, jus claim that serving him is tough and therefore gave up, some even claim that watever he/she has now is much more impt den god.
its ridiculous, the cross is jus so insignificant in their eyes.

and conclusion made was ting has to learn to focus her eyes on God.
if we didnt focus on god, watever we do will be meaningless isnt it?
imagine doing God's work without God in the picture?
sounds illogical isnt it?
when i learn how to get my focus right,
the things that i do is not meaningless as the world claim to be.
i am in the business of winning souls.
and its impt, cos if i lost a deal, its not money that i am losing, its one precious soul.
its not logical to tik that god's love, the cross, souls are meaningless and insignificant!
argh!
and i am convicted once again =)
thankiew holy spirit!

a few days ago, someone ask me this question...
"y is it that our heart can be empty? is it we are not god-centered enough?"
initially, i didnt tik much abt this question.
i tot that its normal and bcos we have this god-shaped hole, and when our heart its empty, we can fill it with the spirit.
but ytd, i am still thinking abt this.
i ask myself... "is it reali normal to feel empty?"
and i asked david when i met him ytd.
he answer me a lot and this strucked me..
"its not empty, i can say is tempted"
and this jus answered my question.

cos i was wondering that since we have jesus to fill this god-shaped hole, there is no reason to feel empty anymore..
but we cant deny the fact that we do feel empty at times.
and david's ans made me learn and realised something.
its not that god doesnt wana fill our god-shaped-hole..
sometimes, its simply us not allowing him to do so..and also, y did he use the word "tempted" instead of "empty" ?
to me, i tik its cos when we are tempted, we want the things that we noe we cannot have it.
since its ungodly desire, how to have it? right?
so when we cant get wat we want, not exactly cant get, is choose not to get..
its natural to feel empty, cos since we have an ungodly desire, God doesnt have the space to stand in our heart anymore.
so, if we allow god to fill us, and to flood his presence in us, and when we are in his presence, the ungodly desires will go away, and that 'empty' feeling will go away as well =)

wah, long entry...
i have learn alot within these 2 days.new conviction and my relationship with God has grown to another level =)
ting shall be focus on God more den anything else and i noe wat i am doing.
the love of god is jus so awesome.
if u tik its dumb, this simply means that u haben taste wat God's love is all abt.
if u are on the verge of giving up, den focus ir eyes on god again...
his love, the cross... isnt this enough?
y give up? =)
alright, i love God.
bye!

2006-07-20T02:27:00.000+08:00

shrugs.
i lost my hp!
its like... again...
i feel so lousy mann.
lost my credibility already.
my dad is not going to buy me a new phone.
cos almost every phone i got, i will lost it..
its jus like a 'sooner or later' fact.
even myself, i dun trust myself..
so careless =(
thou its a lousy phone but its still a phone.. right?
argh, i wana a new phone !

anything contact me thru another number, dun bother to call or sms 90189406 le.
cos 1 more mth, the contract will be over, so this number will be gone for life.
bleghs.
i cant post my new contact number on this public blog..
duhh?
so............. argh, jus ask me directly for my number ba =)

HAIS !

2006-07-19T00:01:00.000+08:00

in the name of tingting i command u, open ur BIG eyes and read on...
bleghs.

one` hey folks, wats the date today?
wahahaha!!
its 19-july !!
my 3rd year anniversary with Jesus!
happy 3year old to me =)
hey jesus, are u as excited as i do?
our special date eh!
Jesus, WHERE IS MY BDAE GIFT?
hehees.
my beloved jesus, u owe me one gift, i dun care.. bleghs.
jesus jesus jesus, happy 3rd year anniversary..
jesus, i enjoyed the 3 years with ya and i am going to celebrate this day till i die.
so when i reach heaven, i shall claim ALL my gifts at one time.
hehees.
so excited!

two` NO ACCOUNTS LESSON!
this news is even more exciting den the world cup.
wahahaas.
sound so nonsense, but... i reali hate going to accounts lesson
yucks!

three` went msia to shop shop.
hmmms, didnt buy much thou.
one new tee and heels =)
and a 10bucks contact lens. wahahas.
but i enjoyed the fellowship! =)
oh ya, that ramlee buger, so disappointing~
hmpz!

hmmms. duno wat to say le.. wahahahs.
yarwnz, i am sleepy..
going to spend time with god and den ZzzZZzzZZzz..
nights folks! =)

2006-07-18T02:17:00.000+08:00

went bpp today~
and yups, went to invite ppl down for closets.
hehehes.
i feel great doing God's work..
was reali scared b4 we start approaching ppl..
my concern was... how to start the conversation?
den i ask the gals this 'duhh' question..
ting:"how do u all normally start a conversation with non-bs that u wana reach out to?"
jiahui:"we are frm youth organisation..blah blah blah.."
hahahs.
i was like..... duhh?!
and i start wondering y am i asking this question..
is not as if i didnt do this b4..
i mean, i an not "duhh-ing" jiahui, i am "duhh-ing" myself!
is like, my concern abt how to start a conversation is so useless.
wahahas.

we are so blessed that 99% of the ppl we approached said that they would consider abt it.
and yups, there are ppl who reject us too!
however, i always blive that when we are doing spiritual work, God is with us..
we do the humanly possible, which is giving our best...
and God will do the humanly impossible..
to stir the hearts of the ppl and to soften them~
and God entrusted me with two precious souls that wasnt saved yet.
i am responsible to sow on them and eventually, bring them to christ =)
as i said, i will give my best and God will do the spiritual work in their hearts =)

had dinner with joyce and jia hui today.
and wad i can say is... it was a rush dinner!
cause i am meeting dan after that dinner and yes, i was late again!
shrugs.
so all in all, that fellowship with joyce wasnt a quality one.
its k, we still have plenty of chances to have quality fellowship!
and i felt reali bad.. cos i am late for "tution" .. sorry dan and elise =(

dan look at my nails and ask me this question..
"is that liquid paper?"
omg.. wahahas!
but anyway, i detroyed that beautiful art on my nails already!
so i shall wait for jency to re-do it for me!
wahahas.
and i have been chanting to my hair lately..
wondering when can i get rid of this mushroom head?
my hair, would u grow faster?
retarded! =X

going JB to shop with eelee they all..
half of me is reluctant..
another half of me is excited!
reluctant cos i am so afraid that i have no money.
its so retard to go JB without money~ hahas.
excited cos i am looking forward to e fellowship and yes, SHOPPING!
1st time going JB shopping without my dad! weee` =)

a food for tot for today..
when we are at the lowest peak of our lives..
we tend to say this to God "God serving u is so tiring, God u seem so far, God, i feel like giving up, God,why? God, obeying u is so tough... and the list goes on..."
and when we are at the high peak of life... we will say this "God u are good! serving u is so exciting! never will i give up, serving u is not a chore! obeying u is the best for me!! and the list goes on..."
why cant we be constant?
high peak,low peak.. no matter wat, our view of serving God should be constant isnt it?
may it be high peak or low peak, the love of God is constant, the fact the jesus died on e cross dun change, God is with us dun change, serving is a joyful thing dun change and many more!

alright, we are sinners.
we are a bunch of irritating ppl.
i reali wonder... how come god can tolerate us?
or mayb, God doesnt view this as toleration..
cos god wasnt impatient in the 1st place~
its amazing...
i guess, we simply cant put our human understanding of love into God.
cos God's love is way beyond our understanding..
omg, this is jus so amazing~
his love reali goes beyond our understandings...
this is the love that human cant give it to me.
i duno how to put wat i wana say in words.
i jus feel so...argh. wahahas
simply put in words, when there is no reason that i could find to forgive that person or even myself, God forgave.
when i thought that this person doesnt deserve another chance cos many chances are given, God gave the 2nd chance or rather 100th chances.
and i cant help it but to ask God... "God, reali arh?"
God's love is the real love.
cos this love cant be replaced by anything on earth.

i wana grow in many areas in my life..
to be constant!
praising God even when things dun go well.
serve him with joy even when problems are knocking on the door..
to say the truth, i am super irritated by ppl whose life is like a roller coaster...
it goes up and down, up and down.
that kind of still praising God ytd and complained today.
can say that i felt impatient and tik that they are nth but craps.
and when the next time round, that person went "up" on the roller coaster ride, i dun reali wana bother, cos i assume that they will jus go "down" on e following day and yups, they are jus crapping~
however, God reminded me that he is jumping with joy when one repents and turn back to him..
so who am i to tik that he/she is crapping? and who am i to be impatient with this person?
God is the one who should feel this way, not me.
of cos, god WUN feel this way and wun think the way i tot =) god is gracious!
however, i always forgot to judge myself b4 judging others.
at times i am that irritating person i was talking abt.. =(
God, i dun wana be this kinda ppl!
i wana be constant.
oh well, its tough... i noe.
but holy spirit, do ur work.
thanks a million =)

towards 17.
west a TWO.. closets is one chance that u can bring ur frenz =)
jiayou!

The World Cup Is Now On Your Favorite Front Page - check out www.yahoo.com.sg

2006-07-17T02:22:00.000+08:00

ting responded during the sat service.. =)
weee`
God threw me this question : "wat makes u so convicted that u are leading a meaningful life?"
i tot abt it and.... i jus answer God..."bcos i have a purpose in life? i noe y i do wat i do? i noe u lord..."
and this question was thrown to me... :"wat is ur purpose in life?"
and yes, when this question pops into my mind, i knew wat God is trying to say..
yups, i am the fisher of man, not manager of man!
and the purpose of everything that i am doing in the kog, it should link back to outreach..
bring the lost souls to the kog.
the great commission has already stated it clearly, morever, its the command frm Jesus.
me, as beliver, dun come to earth and party, rot, enjoy life, i am here to spread the good news to e ppl ard me.
and outreaching is one thing that i cant do when i go heaven..
my purpose on earth is to reach for the lost, and if i am not doing it.. its jus like going to gym and not exercise, going to bugis and not shop, going to skool and not studying blah blah blah..
and if i am not outreaching, which is my purpose on earth, den how am i going to lead a meaningful life?

i will forfeit myself frm alot of joy and blessings!

the greatest joy in life is to see that person u've work on crossing the line of faith.

this joy is something that money cant buy, ur loved ones can give it to u...

outreaching is witnessing abt God's goodness, jus need to tell them wat u have experienced =0

if u love God, outreaching is something natural and u will not find it as a chore..

so ting, do u love God?

outreaching is one thing that i wana place it in my schedule~
i am very convicted abt it..
many times, i told myself that i have to go evax all these..
but i didnt place it in my schedule and it always end up me doing other stuffs instead of going to the field and reach for the lost.
argh..
dun worry, i already fix the days and time with my ppl to go outreach le.
yeah, no more excuses!
i am the fisher of man!

went to jurong east library to do maths jus now.
and guess wat, all of us REGRET going to to this place.
so noisy!
its like, there are bands in the library
they literally jam in the library..
omg, their voice is so aweful that everyone frown..
wahahhas.
and it was so loud that i have to scream in order to communicate to the person beside me.
thats crap lar..
1st time screaming in the library~
happening or not?

david reminded me this today...
holy spirit dun condemn, holy spirit convicts.
so if ever one day, u feel comdemned, are u sure its the spirit or the devil or rather urself?
we have to be spiritually aware and be familiar with God's voice.
and also, the circles of frens..
its good to have a fren even outside our district.
dun only keep our cirlces of frenz within our unit or district.

went to jency's hse to stay over last nite~

nice time knowing wendy and yups, i guess its fruitful!

yay.

love it =)

and ting taught in seed meet!

hehhees.

thank God for all these =)

love it!

serving god is suppose to be joyful..
if u dun feel this way...
u have to get things right and u have miss out the whole thing abt God.
or perhaps, u haben reali noe who this God is =)

oh btw, ting has this feeling of...
"so near yet so far" feeling~
sighs.

i will give my best to the kog.
god ONLY deserve the best.
even giving him the best ting.. =)

The World Cup Is Now On Your Favorite Front Page - check out www.yahoo.com.sg

2006-07-17T00:17:00.000+08:00

Greatest Gift

Condemnation falls away
Never bound to call on me
I am clean, I am clean

The powerful work is here in me
Breaks the chain of guilt and shame
I go free, I go free
I'll take them to your cross and leave them there
Captured by His grace, I'm free at last

It is the great gift of your salvation
Working in me, working in me
It is the life giving taste of heaven
Your kindness revealed, your kindness revealed to me

It's the greatest gift of all, It's the greatest gift of all
It's the greatest gift of all

Mercy's pouring down on me, Mercy's pouring down on me
I am clean, I am clean
Mercy's pouring down on me, Mercy's pouring down on me
I go free, I go free

2006-07-13T04:08:00.000+08:00

at this point of time, i reali hope that i can have the special ability to read ppl's mind..
however, i noe that this is not possible at all..
i blive, God dun create 'communication' for nth..
i blived this is y our ears and mouth are created for..

the work of human's mind are jus too profound for me to understand.
i guess, even if i were to be given a lifetime, still, i wun be able to understand!
human beings are jus too complicated..
and with this complexity, ting wun be able to underatand wat's going on in the other party's mind without communication..
hais.

i noe, the best way to noe abt wat others is thinking is thru communication..
however, wat am i going to do if there is a communication break down?
wat if the channel of communication has been cut off?
we dun have the oppotunity to do so,i dun have the courage to do so and i cannot do so..
how i wish, everything will be back to normal..
ASAP god.. pls.
if only i have put that matter into an end sooner, all these tragedies wun happen..
so God, other den the ability of reading ppl's mind, wat's other method do i have to understand wat's reali going on?
ting is jus so troubled now!!!
i reali duno wat to do ... =(
i am jus too tired to play guessing games, esp guessing the tots of ppl's mind...
argh.. !! hais.

catch up with ah ben jus now.
wah, it has been years since we reali sit down and chit-chat le =)
knew him since i was sec 2.. long time hur??
its reali amazing how time can fly..
the frenz ard me...
some of them drives already, went army, one of them became mummy already..
wah, i'm already 18!
omg, i hab to behave like 18 already!
no more being so kid-ish..
argh, grow up! =p

2006-07-12T02:23:00.000+08:00

finally, everything has settled =)
weeee` freedom!!!!
i noe i will nv walk alone..
God, thanks a million =)
eelee, thanks a million too =p
accounting brings freedom, the word of God set us free.
i am glad that i did it =)
thankiew holy spirt for bugging me!
wahahahs.

had a great time with eelee jus now.
told her everything and phew~ so relieved =)
lurve ya shepherd =)

again, i was reminded how bless west a two is.
God is very faithful with this cg.
will nv forget those barren times..
hahas.
now, we are enjoying the fruits of persevering!
hehes.
within 6 months, west a two has grown frm 5 to 16 =)
a mini cg to a mini unit!!
amen!
reali eh, lets retain all of them and we can break into a unit soon!

God, i can nv thank u enough..
many many times, i reali cannot deny that u are favouring me..
ur love for me is jus so tangible.
i am very sure that ur love is not jus a fairy tale.
when i was young, i always tot that jesus dying on the cross is jus another easter legend and the birth of Jesus is jus another christmas fairy tale.
i did wonder b4 when i was young, y only Jesus bdae have holiday and not buddha's bdae?
wahahas.
however, i experienced ur love and i noe that all these is not a fairy tale, its the truth.
and the truth has set me free=)
felt so loved, so forgiven.

to tik abt it, wat i have done is so dumb mann..
hahahas.
repented le..
i noe, kicking myself dun work..
instead, i have to be more God-concious and accountable.
i am glad that everything has come to an end =)
and i am glad that i can laugh at my own stupidity and no longer dwell in it.

i dun deny that there is still puny bits of fear in my heart.
however, holy spirit is constanly reminding me that i shouldnt fear.
cos i have HIM =)
jus live my life pleasing to god, jus do wat is rite..
no point fearing, fear is due to i am too inward looking, too self-concious..
however, if i plug myself into the presence of God, fear wouldnt have 'space' in my heart.
so its all abt focusing on God, be more God-concious..
and i will not fear =)
hurray

Real people. Real questions. Real answers. Share what you know.

2006-07-12T01:59:00.000+08:00

alright... i find them kinda insulting~ however, its funny and interesting =)

oh well, for ur info, these are banned commercials... =p

2006-07-11T00:34:00.000+08:00

had dispute with aaron.
argh.
infuriated!!!

procastinate to do maths today~
due to my crave for slp~
wahahas.
however, i did maths anyway =)
wouldnt wan to leave an bad impression and its for my own good hur? =)

mins after mins, hours after hours.
my heart beats faster and faster..
disquieting heart, thats so annoying!
btw this has no link with the dispute with aaron~
fear and worries has crippled me, God, help me to stand up again...
i trust in u.

there is this card in my wallet says...
-DON'T WORRY ABOUT TOMMORROW, GOD IS ALREADY THERE-

this always nv fail to comfort me =)
thank u God!

2006-07-10T14:50:00.000+08:00

since i have done the right thing..
i shouldnt be afraid.
i shouldnt be worried.
God will settle everything.
God is in control..
tiingg!! dun worry =)

my heart sank when i noe the truth..
u simply treat me as a trash.
y am i treasuring u so much when u didnt even respect me?
so sad =(
~~but i noe, in the family of God, nth worse will happen=p~~

i tik i am so dumb, i only noe e truth ytd.
its has been a long time that i am a fool.
its ok mann, God is with me =)

freedom, this is wat i longed for.
and guess wat?
i am pretty sure that i have been set-free.
i feel uneasy, but i noe its the right thing to do so =)

2006-07-10T05:26:00.000+08:00

FRANCE LOST!!
ARGH.

so angry mann..
i felt so...argh!
thou i am so noob abt soccer, i knew that they are SO CLOSE to win.
irritating!

hahas.. so funny one..
i was pulling my hair when they miss that goal~
1st time lidat.

dun care, i shall be a sore loser.
i wana be in anti-italy club!
i am sure that keith will join me!
wahahas.
on msn, he was like too angry to slp le..
hahahs.
funny~

so sad =X

2006-07-10T02:57:00.000+08:00

x finally, ting has been set free... and i felt reali relieved =) was actually regreting for accounting, but now, nope. i feel so good =) thanks eelee =)
God help me thru ppl, its a boo-boo to tik that i can handle...
no wonder i felt so defeated everytime..
i noe, this is not e end, this is the begining~
i am prepared to face watever is ahead.
those concequences~
God, help me.. protect me..
i hope that everything will turn up well...
really..
its not comfy to bring the dark to light..
however, its the right thing to do..
and we must not be deceived by the devil, he will use our feelings to fool us..
however, bringing everything to light can reali set us free.
God, thank u =)
now, i can serve God in a more powerful way! =)

x West A TWO hit 16 for service!
witness two precious souls crossing the line of faith =)
thats e most joyful thing that can ever happen..
reali glad for them!
hope that they will stay in this wonderful family..
in jesus name!
i reali duno wat to say..
reali appreciate those who have worked hard for this harvest =)
hey Gals, hitting 16 is wonderful!!
however, this is jus the begining..
we cannot jus stop here alright?
wah..
exciting =)
dun be tired, cos God is our strength, we serve God with God's strength..
amen?
for ur info, if plus the NBs in.. west a 2 have ard 16 ppl already!
connect them and make sure everyone comes, we can be a unit le!
yeah!
new shepherds have to rise up =)

x God spoke to me...
as a leader, i cannot be a manager!
only noe how to manage the grp and making sure that everything goes well is not enough!!
we are called to be the fisher of man..
we called to outreach!
to reach for those who are lost.
nth in this face of the earth can be more impt den winning souls.
no matter how much probs u have, no matter wat happen to u.. at least u noe that when u die, u can go heaven..
but for those who didnt noe God, not only they will face probs, they will go to hell after they die!
dun u tik that they are pitiful?
wats the worse thing that can happen to us when we outreach?
the most, we kana reject..
but if we dun share to them, its a matter of death and live.
the more we outreach, e more we should be passionate for God!
tiredness and fear is not an excuse =)
loses that passion is cos we haben been outreaching!
so ting, u are called to be the fisher of man and not manager of man!
outreach should be in my everyday life =)

x shared testimony in NW-PCLM..
shared abt my gals.
abt how they grow, how powerful they are now =)
the AES little gals, u noe who u are..
i am reali proud of u guys.
how i wish that i can praise u infront of the whole church!
God look highly on u =)

x ting is watching soccer tonight!
miracle can happen at times!
wahahahs,
1st time watching lars.
i only wana watch finals.
wahahas..
i hope that france will win!
cos everyone says that france will lose..
i am trying to be different.. wahahas.
lame!
anyway, i am a noob in soccer.. wahahas

x ting's journey gonna be more exciting..
more breakthrus..
=)
i repented for wat i've done.
thank God for his grace and mercy.
i wana be a better person for God.
i am glad that God still loves me, and even more and more each day!
thankiew God for that 2nd chance that i needed =p
God is a God of 2nd chance

x CLOSETS.. ICE MAN RETURNS..
these are the tools of bringing ur frenx to come !
yeah, be assured that its gonna be awesome and expect high level of fun there =)
bring ur frens along!
no point doing all these if there is no non-b coming..
agree?
hehees.
hard work!
God honours those who give God her/his best =)

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

Real people. Real questions. Real answers. Share what you know.

2006-07-08T03:58:00.000+08:00

argh, i cant fell asleep..
flipping on my bed, changing position..
and this has last for an hour until i decide to on my com instead of wastin time on bed.
tiingg is very extream today.
one extream, i am reali disquiet..
another extream, happy.
in e midst of laughers, i sigh..
in e midst of disquietness, i smiled.
isnt that nuts?

actually, i guess u guys can jus ignore my previous post.
ytd i felt that sense of victory..
and guess wat, today i felt so defeated.
oh well, does being angry with myself helps?
or mayb i should be mad at the cause of my 'breaking down'.
again and again, tiingg was destroyed by it.
God, help me!

if u noe me, flip-flop-ing on my bed is nth unusual..
yups, i have prob in falling asleep!
last night wasnt an exception.
was thinking abt wat can i do to exprience the real freedom that i am longing?
and this tot came across my mind..
+ account

some flashbacks..
the 1st time that i felt set-free was 2005, i supposed.
i pick up my courage to account my deep secrets to shuz.
b4 accounting, i noe that holy spirit was bugging me.
and i tell u, that feeling was so.... argh.
i reali cant find any words to describe how i feel than..
i rmber that day, it was so significant..
accounted, and guess wat.
i sleep with a smile, i woke up with a smile.
breakthrus in my spiritual walk and felt so set-free.
i am no longer binned!

oh well, i am pretty sure that this is God trying to tell me something.
that freedom that i longed for, it has happened b4..
and today, i need to be set free.
i gonna account!
meeting joyce this sat, tiingg is going to reveal the real ting to her.
tiingg has never reveal herself to others b4...
tiingg has not been the real tiingg..
as God is speaking to me, joyce jus pop up in my mind.
i guess, she is e best candidate =) hahas.
and of cos, she is the one that i truely trust =)

Jesus, i reali hope that everything will come to an end.
God, can i be the one that put everything to an end?
will i be able to do that?
those anxieties - shoo~

today, i went bugis with my sheep, jes.
wow, reali had fun there =)
had alot of sweet memories there.
i bought one tee and one shorts.
i love it =)
i lurve the company of jes, she is one person that i feel so comfortable to be with =)

and yups, we took neo prints!
u noe wat?
the last time i took this kinda pics was 3 years ago!
was rejecting this mann..
cos its ex and once its not nice, ur money will be gone jus lidat!
risky~
but yeah, took it today.. hahas.
i wonder wat had changed my mind mann.
but praise God, it turn out to be not bad =)
kinda sweet thou..
i will post it some days later =)
jes, rmber our deal? =p
-rings and cakes.

went home and guess wat?
david was at my hse!
he came to stay over...
felt abit bad to disturb him and aaron~
wahahas..
and yes, the new recipe soup was nice but salty~
wahahas.
thanks aaron and david!
did confirmation and guess wat?
david hit 12!
yeah!!!!!!
ur P12~
and i hit 17!!!
hooray!!!!
17 leh!
omg.
thank to those who have work hard =)

hey wanling, if u are reading this..
jus wana tell ya that i thank u for ur hard work.
thou ur frenz didnt agree to come tml, but yea, as long as u have done ur best..
God saw ur effort!
its ok, dun give up and yea, God will bless one =)
dun be discourage k!
i reali appreciate u in my cg and i blive God appreciate ur hard work too!

for the rest, thanks for bring ur frenz!
when ur frenz exprience wat is true love, wat is it abt by living a meaningful life, i bet that they will thank u a million!
wahahahas.
this kind of reward is worth our extra miles ya?

there are too many things in the world for me to worry abt.
however, there are alot of things that worth my smile =)
even there is nth that goes well, thanking God for his love, the salvation that was given to me freely is more den enough.
isnt that true?
i can say that my passion for god is still alive.
its not dead.
as long as there is still lost souls out there, my passion shouldnt be dead.
as long as God still loves me, there is no reason for me to turn my back frm him.
everything can fade away, but e wog wun..
everything changes, but the e love of god dun.
the world cause me to be so insecure, but i can always find my security in the lord's arm =)

westA2 will be going to a new chapter if we can constanly hit more den 15.
no longer we are cg, we will be an unit!
new CLs will rise up, new shepherds, new dynamics.
omg, i cant wait for this day to come!
if i am going to give up, i will be worse den a loser.
ting is very on to see a unit for jesus.. wat abt u ? =)

all i need to focus is...

+ my studies.
make sure i can go into a good poly course =)
make sure i dun disappoint e ppl who went extra miles for me..
~dan feng-teaches me maths despite physically tiredness.
~eelee- went extra miles for me, searh teachers, encouraging me..
~daddy -pay for my skool fees, expensive!

+ my grp.
i mus disciple new Cls, new shepherds.
a unit for jesus!

+ my relationship with God and man.

+ myself.
~a better me.

the rest, if its God's will, i will focus.
if not, shoo!
dun try to distract me. =p

hmmms wat else did i forget to say?
okay...
i tik thats abt it.
tml will be a tired but exciting day for me ! =)
1st time ever seeing 17 ppl in my cg.
wahahas.
pray that everything will go well =)

Real people. Real questions. Real answers. Share what you know.

2006-07-07T03:27:00.000+08:00

tiingg's eyelids are heavy..
tiingg is so sleepy now..
after this post, tiingg is going to do maths!
call her nuts? kekekes.
for ur info, the speed of tiingg doing maths is......
0.1m/hr?
k lar, i am trying to say that...
i do math in a very slow speed - in a high degree.
argh!

hmmms.
i had a sense of victory.
one of my greatest fear that i seriously do not anticipate finally took place AGAIN.
oh well, all i can say is i reacted in a very different way compared to the previous one.
when that 'happening' happened the other time, i felt so defeated, i felt so at lost..
and of cos, i felt so dumb and unworthy.
this time round, every word that i said, it was processed in my mind and duhh, i asked god to help me!
at the end of e day, not denying the fact that i was abit angry.
i neither felt defeated nor lost.. but i felt very 'monkey'

cos i noe that he treated me as one.
fooled me again and again, and oh well, he tik its interesting~
the comforting part is.. at least i have made a big step =)
yay, freedom! i am free frm this stupid thingy.

i read my journal that was written a month ago..
and its impossible to deny that god has been faithful to me!
last mth, i am trapped and yay, God has set me free =)
a decision was made since den, ting must learn to guard her heart and ting have to make a decision to please god even when no one was watching~

oh well, i was kinda immune already.
ting will be affect by u.
no longer ting will trust u.
and yes, the more u are lidat, e more ting detest ur every action.
and u have ruin ur self image by doing this.
who would appreciate this ugly side of u?
and yes, i will still love u cos God loves u =)
and yes, ting was set-free =)
this kind of feeling rawks my socks =p

as i read my journal, i realised that god has moulded me to be a better me.
i realised that together with God, i have overcome alot alot =)
God is faithful!

God, jus now i told u that i wana be set aside for ur kingdom.
i wana do great things for u!
i lurve this ting now.
the one that is so excited for God.
argh, i am on fire!

i kept smiling to myself!
the feeling that i have been longing for.
JOY!

kk gotta go to mug for maths le.
euu are my motivation =)

retarded me =p

not forgetting God's blessings~

+ as u guys noe.. my pathetic phone have to be sent for repairing.. due to tight schedule, today is the only day that i will be available.. this morning, it jus stucked me that my waranty is going to expire soon! and i duno when.. and guess wat? the expiry date is 07/07/2006.. hahas. THANK GOD! simply late for one day and there goes my pathetic phone~ =)

+ how can i not give thanks for the wonderful ppl that God place in my cg? =) gals, i lurve u all to bits! God is favouring me by placing u gals in westA2.. that smile on my face jus appeared when i tot of u gals. hahas. confirmation was 13.. keep it up!! unit for jesus!! =) *ptss..DAVID HOE, there is one AES guy coming!! =) weee~ i am reali glad! wana see unit size in AES too! =)

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

The World Cup Is Now On Your Favorite Front Page - check out www.yahoo.com.sg

2006-07-06T00:21:00.000+08:00

errrrrr... as u guys noe, i hate ~~WED~~ alot!
hahahas.
but kk lar.. today wasnt that bad to mii !!
a short account of ting's wed =p
here i go...!

tiingg's morning

SLEEPING !! duhh?
i slept at 4plus am!
argh.
i had a habit to on my hp's volume to the max b4 i sleep cos i am afraid that i cant hear my alarm..
and guess wat, this lousy phone nv failes to freak me out!
more den once, i missed one heartbeat due to this utra-loudness of the volume.
and i was awaked by this freaking phone..
actually even b4 that sms came, i find myself having difficulty falling asleep already..
received jackie's sms in e morning and yups, i have to go skool.
duhh, its wed, i noe there is lesson..
and he "please" me to go skool cos its tcher's bdae.
i dun reali ~~give a damn~~ for that tcher's bdae anyway.
but i went, cos i wana learn and dun wana waste my skool fees.
hahas.

tiingg's noon

DRAG MY FEET.
argh, i am so reluctant to go skool.
the tot of ~~accounts~~ jus freak me out.
accounts!!! yucks!
and guess wat?
i reach skool so early =(
i duno wats wrong with the train today.
so fast~
celebrated his bdae and lesson started.
1st 2 hr was ok.. wrote down notes, recap abt wat i've learn when i was sec 5..
and the last 2 hr was like hell.
bored`ed.
was abit displeased by my skool mann.
cos every mth have to pay 2 mths in advance, i am talking abt skool fees.
and its so weird!
every mth pay two mths in advance.. den when can stop paying?
duno y, i find it so ~~meaningless~~ to go skool.
cant even hear the wat e accounts tcher was talking abt, and paid 60bucks jus for 5hrs of maths per mth.
however if i stop attending skool, i have to work..
so yeah, i shall continue to drag my feet 2 times a week.
i noe, ting is so not gentle now.
~~complains after complains!~~
ting!! would u learn to give thanks for it? argh.

tiingg's evening

AFTER SKOOL !! weeeee!
heading to bt panjang to mit cindy for shepherding.
the journey was longer den expected.
i was looking forward to mit her.. yeah!
its has been sometime since we reali catch up with one another =)
actually ting lurves shepherding alot!
may it be eelee shepherding me or me shepherding my sheep.
cos this is a set-aside time for the both of us to do some catching up with one another's life
and also, shepherdings are the times that belong to only u and me! =)
another reaon might be cos i prefer one to one meetings rather den a grp.
i am an introvert? wahahahahs. (note that ques mark)
blegh.

tiingg's thoughts for today...

can i be that someone that i have been longing to be?
i duno is it i am not satisfy with my own thinking world, my life, in whole, am i not satify with tingting?
however, i understand that its best to be myself.
but at times, ~~i dun like the real me.~~
at times, ~~i dun like the way i reacted.~~
at times i dun like being so 'jelly-liked' due to my ~~fear of making firm decision and fear of rejecting others.~~
at times, ~~i dun like myself for having no self-control~~
at times, ~~i dun like myself for disappointing God.~~
st times, ~~i dun like myself for wasting year 2006.~~
at times, ~~i dun like myself taking o levels at the age of 18.~~
at times, ~~i dun like myself for not working hard enough.~~
at times, ~~i dun like mself for not being a good daughter to both earthly daddy and heavenly daddy.~~
at times, ~~i dun like myself for not being a good example as a leader.~~
and the list goes on...
so i long to be that someone in my heart of hearts.
that wonderful tingting =)

however, at times i love myself to bits!
for ur info, i dun tik i am a low esteem person~
errrr....
yups, i dun tik i am.
its jus that sometimes, some part of my brain cells ain working well..
hehes.

i am God's beloved child =p
ok ting, God deserve a better u!

btw, these few days.
my world revolves ard MATHS MATHS MATHS.
hahahas.
begin to lurve maths le =)
e reason y i am so disciplined is cos dan always give me hmwk!
hahahas.
i am so grateful mann =)
i doubt he will read my post..
actually, i am reali touch that even thou he's tired he still made the effort to mit me..
teaching me maths with his army uniform.
thanks a million =)
i must to my best !!
and not forgetting eelee.
she always went extra miles for me =)
i lurve u eelee!
my love lang is actually acts of service.. and guess wat, this has melted me completly!
i am so blessed =)

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

The World Cup Is Now On Your Favorite Front Page - check out www.yahoo.com.sg

2006-07-05T02:47:00.000+08:00

LORD I LIVE BY UR WORD

Lord i live by Your word
Lord i live by every word from Your mouth
I'm like a tree by the stream
I'm bearing fruits my leaves are green
All that I do is prospering o Lord
I live by Your word

As the rain and the snow comes down from heaven
That waters the earth and bring forth it's fruits
so shall be the word that You have spoken
it shall not return empty to You
it shall accomplish Your desire
it surely will succeedYour word tranforms the desert and Your word is changing me

2006-07-04T00:43:00.000+08:00

this post gonna be an announcement post!! wahahahas.

1st of all....
westA2 held the 1st potential shepherd meet ever!!
its great mann! =)
15 for JESUS!!

2nd`ly...
tiingg's hp is spolied!
and i hab to use that kuku phone...
its too kuku that i dun dare to take it out and i silence it.. wahaha
so if ever u sms or call me, and i didnt pick up or reply super late, dun blame me!
cos ii cant hear my phone.
if its super urgent, try calling many many times that i might feel the vibration~
lols.

3rd`ly...
ting is not 50kg!!!
i promise myself that if i hit ~~50kg~~, i will go into depression mode.
and guess wat?
ard last mth, i was at kaining's hse and i weight myself..
and guess wat? 50KG!!
i was STUNNED!
so i refuse to blive that weighing machine.. haha
ytd, went to eelee's hse..
and i weight.. it was 48KG!
oh.. its the same as the past..
so its either i slim dow 2kg for e past month or kaining's weighing machine spoil.
cos eelee's weighing machine was proven accurate, and kaining's did not!!
~~50kG~~ Shoo!!

i tik thats abt it..
wahaha
cant reali rmber wat to say lehs...
=p

2006-07-03T12:30:00.000+08:00

from jia hui:

hahas,, its ok to be long,, but u reply can ler.. i also very happy to hab u as a CL! really.. dun mind telling u..i NEVER NEVER regret knowing God.. last ltme i think of backslide..but in e end i dit nort.. =) i will be a shepherd de da mermaid! hahas.. i also got pray for u de, and on friday God spoke to me & say.. "ur land will grow!" i am so HAPPY! yarh.. i blive westA2 can grow! SURELY! we must hab gaith in God!!! hahas.. more ppl luke me!! hahas! lame de me.. i am serious in games, hahas. i hope to lead more things in cg..but slowly slowly.. hahas..
God will bless de!!
lurve you!
-jia hui-
xiao lion!

hahas.... its sweet isnt it?
omg, i am going to be drown in this honey land!
wahahas.
jiahui, thanks for adding support to me and ur letter have make my day =)

to say the truth.. i am reali proud to be in west A.
not only in westA2 but as the whole unit.
hahas.
dun ask me y.. i also duno!
but i have the feeling that this unit is where i belong and its the best ! =)
lalalalas.
i am very blessed.
i lurve the cg i belong to.. which is westA dmm..
david,joyce and eelee!! my beloved cg =)
and i love the cg that i am leading...
westA2 !!

if u dun feel belong in this cg.. den i am reali wondering y.
cos there is no way to enter westA2 without experiencing any family warmth, cos we love u dearly. =)
my precious~
dun left urself out alright? =p
lets connect our NEW-b and those who are not with us.
dun give up kk? =)

2006-07-02T04:26:00.000+08:00

ii lurve my today alot =)
physically, i am dead tired..
reali !!
cant stop yawrning..
but spiritually, i am so refresh mann.

learn reali alot today..
reali alot..
actually, i wana post lyrics, bible verses on blog de..
however, i am reali lazy lar.
wahahahas.
jus that, everything seems so meaningful to me today.
wahahahas.
i was wondering, those who harden their hearts and didnt learn as much today..
jus too bad lor, cos u've missed out big time, and time will not turn back jus for ur sake.

i was thinking...
sometimes, during sermon, when God spoke, as a shepherd, we tend to tik that this way.. "this is for her, hope she will respond!"
hurr, haha... sounds familiar eh?
but i have made a decision, i wana listen for my sake.
as in, not that i am selfish and i dun bother abt my flock anymore lar..
however, God need to speak to me 1st b4 i can pastor my flocks.
and and and, i mus position myself for HIM to speak.
as i am listening, of cos i pray that my flocks are listening as well, as i learn, they learn, as i respond, they respond too!
however, if u choose not to, there is nth much i can do, no point for me to be distracted jus bcos u choose to be spiritually deaf..

i duno y leh...
felt alot abt time..
as in, cos time is one thing that, once its gone,its gone.
there will only be one '1st july 2006' and i very scared that i will miss out, esp today is a sat.
a 'set-aside' day to mit God.
so wats the point if i have miss it hur?
and and and.. if God spoke, and i didnt catch it, kicking myself a million times will definelty not work!

anyway, we have a convert today!!
hurray!!
praise God =)
in jesus name, she will be connected to this warmth family of god =p
our precious~

ting have to be eager in learning~
she cant be passive, cos when she is eager, she gained.
she cant forfeit herself by being so passive ..
be an active learner!

two person, same room,same preacher
different attitudes, different agendas, different level of expectancy..
walk out..
different level of joy, different life.
one noe God more, one din..
one noes the ans, e other still lost.
one has already pick herself up, one, still thinks that she's hurt.
all i can say is....
too bad for the one that miss out.
ting pity u.
so wad can i do?
cry together? -nahz
laugh at u? -nahz
pity u? -nahz
oh oh, den wat can i do?
NOTHING.

i lurve my God.
he is so wonderful =)
he loves me!

2006-06-30T01:52:00.000+08:00

omg, today is the day that i wasted lotsa time!
and my time are spent on travelling..
wahahaha.
let me tell ya how lame it is.
all bcos i listened to them, we lost our way frm jes's hse to bt panjang!
omg.
we made lotsa detours and finally reach that place after a LONG journey.
took bus and travel alot alot..
can die in the bus.
reali !!

in the bus journey..
i tik alot alot!!
my maths reali lousy leh.
reali.
i cant even calculate correctly if that figure has many decimal points.
argh.
i reali wana score well in Os leh.
so that i can done dan proud.
and i can move on!

and i suddenly tot of my bdae..
thou its still some time away..
but when i tot of my bdae, the next person i will tik is JEREL CHEN.
still cant forget how he spoil my 1st bdae in church.
so since NB, i've lost my innocence, cos i noe that tricks of the church ppl already.
wahahaha.
have been celebrating my bdae in church for 3 years le.
and 3 years i will celebrate with him, miss the times when we help each other to spy our grps.
to spy wat gifts they are getting, how to celebrate etc. thats lame thou..
and i feel so weird if this year nv celebrate my bdae together with him.
wahahaha.
but the good news is...
we are celebrating together again this year!
the good idea was, jio the west alumni together, and celebrate.
argh, so excited!!!!
i look forward to our bdaes =)
opps, pls dun misunderstand, he is not my crush~ wahaha

anyway, i am feeling unwell AGAIN!
in jesus name, no more fever pls!
my "head-cracking" headache is back.
thank God, my temp is only 36.9. wahahaha
still very far frm fever.
in jesus name, let it remain in 36.9 and heal my headache pls.
its killing me.

confirmation was lousy!
gals!! my beloved gals, 15 15 15 !!
lets hit it and move on!
but my gals reali melt my heart..
i saw how hard they work, and i cant help but to thank god again and again.
Jesus, if u dun bless west a 2, den who will u bless?
we work so hard.. Jesus, jus tell us wat we are lacking.
i blive all of us will do my best de!

Jency, if u are reading this...
when's the next shopping?
great spore sales is ending!
i miss ya alot jency.
wahahaa
long time no chat and mit up le.
lets chill out soon fren =)
i love u lots =p

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

Real people. Real questions. Real answers. Share what you know.

2006-06-28T00:07:00.000+08:00

humans are complicated creatures.
with such complexity, God can actually understand them all.
so, how to deny the fact that He is the creator and we are his creation?

God, u understand me ..dun u?
i reali duno wat to do now..
pls guide me..
and i want to stay close to u.
bcos only when i stay close with u, i can walk in the right way.

oh well, actually i am not that lost lar.
but God, jus guide me
hehe
but to say the truth, i am easily frustrated nowadays.
argh, i need a breakthru in this!

i am reali blessed.
cos the aes gals are all so with me in 15.
anyway gals, 15 is like....
hais.
jus hit it once and for all and move on.
have a few contacts coming and a few converts already~
oh well, gotta work harder already!
now, youths is not my "tian xia" already.
wahahaha.
its the younger generstions
cos i realised that its easier for them to share christ.
cos the moment i approach the kids, they will tot that i have motives or something.
age gap lar~
hahahaha...

o level is coming!
oh no.
i duno if i can do well or not.
but thank God.
met dan feng today..
hmmms...
is A1 possible?
i seriously doubt
but i wana give my best to this.
i am more determined to study le..
thanks dan =)
i hope i wun disappoint eelee,dan and my dad.
at this point of time, i realised that studying is not jus solely for my sake already.
i duno if this is a good 'realisation', but ya lar, feeling stress but at the same time motivated.

today, dan feng ramdomly asked me this...
"wat u wana do when u grow up?"
i tik he ask this cos he wana noe wat course i wana get in or something lar..
hais, i am always stuck when ppl throw this kinda question to me.
i reali duno wat i wana be, i duno wat course i wana get in.
i have no dreams, no goals in life.
my ideal life is reali simple.
get a stable job in future and thats it.
sounds so naive.
but thats wat i wan..
to have a stable income, do the things that i like..
marry a man with more den enough income..
live for my hubby, live for God and be a good wife.
i dun wana be a career woman, i dun wana be at the top or something, i dun have big goals or dreams fir my future..
i jus want a life that is stable and simple.
so if u wana ask me wat i wana do when i grow up, its like this
but its naive.
but in my heart of hearts, i reali wana lead this kinda of life.
haha, but its all God's plan lar.
where he set my feet on, i will jus obey =)

Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires
[-gal 5 : 24-]

got the msg?

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

The World Cup Is Now On Your Favorite Front Page - check out www.yahoo.com.sg

2006-06-27T01:53:00.000+08:00

ii simply love the lyrics of this song =)
enjoy!
this is the GOD that we are talking abt..
and i cant help but to tik that i am his beloved!! =)

Above All

Above all powers, above all kings

Above all nature and all created things

Above all wisdom, and all the ways of man

You were there before the world began

Above all kingdoms, above all thrones

Above all wonders the world has ever known

Above all wealth and treasures of the earth

There's no way to measure what you're worth

Crucified, laid behind the stone

You lived to die, rejected and alone

Like a rose, trampled on the ground

You took the fall

And thought of me, above all

2006-06-24T02:09:00.001+08:00

okay, a speedy post!
argh.
tml is the day mann.
we hit 15!!
yeah!!
amen!!
hahahaha.
pray that it wun ~~drop~~ mann!
gonna pray later!
wah.. god, mus help us =)
help us!!

i am recovered!
the timing kinda right.
oh anyway, i am still coughing!
its irritating mann!
cos my chest feels so uncomfy.

oh ya..
i have a new name.
david calls me donkey.
-_-
and u noe wat?
its outta no reasons~
hmmms, a good one!
wahahaha.

have alot to say.
but hais..
either is a boo boo to say or cos i'm too lazy!
watever it is~ =p

GOD!!! 15!!
thank God that we nv change our goal!
thank u GOD !
hehehes
i tik i cant slp le
wahaha
my heart is pumping fast!
=p

actually.. i had a few post that ~~complains~~ abt my sickness
but i deleted all already.
i duno y..
anyway, i kinda thank God for this 7 days illness.
in the process, i had alot of mixed feelings..
aiya, alot to say, shall jus skipped that part.
anyway, i cant deny that God is the answer of everything.
i must say that i am more despo to seek God.
i miss God alot.
wahahaha. sounds weird.

God u are the answer.
u are the peace that i am looking for.
you are the one that can meet all my needs.
u are the one that can calm the storm in my heart.
all i need is to turn to u..
in the mists of those agonies..
jus the tot of turning to u brings me peace.
and when i turn to u, ur presence comforts my heart.
thank u lord =)
i am sorry for thinking the way i tik.
God, u are my mental support.
i need u..
=)

2006-06-18T14:22:00.000+08:00

God : "y so many concerns? y dun u jus trust in me?"
ting:"Ya.. y am i worrying this and that? y dun i jus commit to the lord?"

indeed, nowadays i am feeling so troubled.
got jumpy over little things.
cant settled down my heart over little things..
haii yo!
ya lor... jus do wat i can do, do my best..
den God will do the rest, the results is determined y God.
so.. i am worrying for nth!!
wahahaha.
ting.. u have to trust God mann..
dun take things in my own hand..
jus b assured that i am doing it for God and God will take care of everything de..
yeah!
i have the "set-free" feeling when God knock senses into my head that i have been worrying too much.

to do great things for god, i gotta to learn how to be calm..
esp emotions.
yups, i am glad to say that i have grown alot in terms of emotions.
ya lar, true.. i am a human...
when things dun go well, i will be so so distracted.
example.. when i saw one of my cg member fell asleep in service ytd.. i cant concentrade wat the preacher is preaching ! i dun reali noe wat my mind is thinking.. all i noe is i feel so upset abt it and yups, i didnt learn much =(
argh, i feel so DUMB!
however, i wana grow more in this area..
as in.. noe how to let my heart sit down before God and trust that God will take care of it..
i dun have to worry for little things mann!
duno how to explain..
understand?

5 more days..
15 !
to say the truth.. i am very scared!
15 is a challenge..
the reason y i dun wana change my goal cos i feel that its normal to face probs and i dun wana change goal jus bcos we are facing probs.. cos lidat, forever we wun hit goal one..
cos which cg dun face probs mann ?
and probs is not gonna be a once-off thing.
so God, please help us..
u will bring us thru right?
i dun care mann, gonna wack!
God, i must not doubt!
cannot trust with wat my eyes told me..
mus trust in ur promises..
trust in u.
since u are almighty god..
15 is peanut hurr?

God.. we will do our best..
the result depends on u
God, i dun wana doubt =)
trust in u, daddy!

anyway...
to mr NG and mr GOD..
happy father's day!
muacks =)
my daddies.
lurve ya.

2006-06-16T04:31:00.000+08:00

oh well...
blogging at wee hours.
initially, i wana blog to kill time cos have to wait for my mp3 to be fully charged.
due to my serious stm, i forgot to charge it..
and guess wat?
1 sec ago, my mp3 was fully charged.
but since i am here.. i shall jus blog lar.

i am damn pissed lar..
my previous blogskin cause my blog to be DUPER lag..
so i have to change..
den my tag board cant tag anymore!
tried alot of ways that dun work..
so i decided to change tag board..
i change to 'flooble' tag board.
den i hate it alot!!
cos cbox pampered me badly, i tik flooble sucks.
and ... something great and pissed happen..
i realise... i jus have to re-copy the html code and i can use my cbox le!!
good news, however, i feel dumb..
cos i spend lots time on the new tag and end up using back the old one again..
okay, if u dun understand nvm.
wahahaha

okay back to serious topic..
i am very convicted to be firm and strong.
to tik, i seriously think that satan dun have confident in himself.
cos he trambles with fear when he see how passionate God's ppl are.
he do stupid stuns in order to win innocent souls to the kingdom of darkness.
however his stupid stuns seems to be effective!
ok, wat i mean is... effective to those who are dumb and not have a clear state of mind.
ok i noe i dun sound nice and gentle.. but its the truth hurr?
argh. satan, stop poking our ppl!
argh ppl.. wake up and stop being dumb!
y fall into his trap when u noe its trap?
okay i admit that sometimes, i am that dumb.
but God!! do something !

i thank God.. reali thanking him..
thou my cg was in this kinda situations...
one by one, ppl are rejecting god..
but the ppl seems to be even more deseperate..
thank God that none dwell into e circumstances.
okay, i rmber hearing someone said something lidat...
"jus give me 10 commited man and we can change the world."
i have ard.. 6 commited warriors in this cg..
if 10 can change the world..
den 6 can definelty change bt panjang zone rite?
hehhehees.

i begin to understand wat it means by we are engaged in a spiritual warfare le..
indeed, we are like in war mann!
jia hui even commented that we are like thieves..
hahahas.
cos that night they went to a cg member's hse to visit her..
cos the person tries to avoid or something.. den all of them hide and sneak ard..
i tik its kinda funny thou.
but applause! thank God for u gals =)
if God place west a two in bt panjang zone, god can use us to do something to this zone.
God we are not here to party and rot hurr?
we are here to battle against the darkness.
sounds so drama.. wahaha
but God, be with us =)
the one(God) that is with us are greater den the ones that are against us.
amen.

dun feel defeated.
pls dun.
cos we are not defeated.
victory is jus on the way.
or to say.. victory is our birthright.

where ever we step our feet on, we will bear fruit.
the lord's promis.
the one that will nv return to him empty.
faith!

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-06-14T00:03:00.000+08:00

it has been for sometime that ting smile to herself =)
and i seriously love this feeling.
its like.. i feel as if i am the most joyful ppl on earth..
the journey frm orchard to home seems so short thou the bus was extreamly long..
wahaha
i look like some woman going bonkers on street..
keep calling ppl to crap.. cos i jus feel like talking !
lols.

after meeting with eelee...
i am double assured of wat i am doing.
she showed me a verse that i cant help it but to do more for God..
[- acts 5 : 38-39 -]
38Therefore, in the present case I advise you: Leave these men alone! Let them go! For if their purpose or activity is of human origin, it will fail. 39But if it is from God, you will not be able to stop these men; you will only find yourselves fighting against God."
in short, the ppl were persecuted by the ppl out there... and this is written =)

if god wana us to do something no one can go against us and our passion shouldnt die down..
cool man!
and i can caught eelee's spirit..
she was on the verge of pulling all her hair down when she talk abt reaching to the youths in singapore..
youths in spore..
hmmms, indeed 1000 is little.
mind u, 1000 is less den one skool's population..
argh... so excitng.

actually, one thing i reali need is compassion for the ppl out there..
and passion to serve God.
if serving God is like a chore, den something is reali wrong!
cos serving is the result of love, ministry is suppose to draw us closer to God.
if only god can let me feel just 1% of how he feel towards the ppl.
i am VERY sure that my attitude will nv be the same mann.
God... place ur burden in me..

ii told eelee wats my big dream for god..
and i tot she will "wow.."
but guess wat?
hahahhaa...
not only she didnt "wow..."
she said....
"aiya, God can use u to do more den that.."
oh well....
all i can say is...
amen =)
lols.

God, i tik....
u look highly of me eh..
y am i so privilege?
i dun deserve it !
thats grace all abt..
argh, thank u God =)

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-06-12T03:32:00.000+08:00

ohh... i have lots and lots of things to say!!
prepared ur tibits already??
alright.. here i go!!

let me talk abt camp.
oh well... i went blog surfing jus now and guess wat?
alot of ppl blogged abt camp!!!
and their entry is like... so long..
ok, mine wouldnt be an exception.
wahahaha...

all i can say is.. the camp was awesome!
dunno how to say.. jus wana say that this camp seems so different frm the others in the past.
as in, i nv felt so awesome before.
i can say that this is the camp that kinda turn my life around....
and u noe wat? I LURVE IT !!!

i met all my camp objectives...
e feeling is like... woo`hoo!! =)
let me tell ya..
in the 2nd day of the camp...
shirls says that 080606 will be the day that many ppl's life will change..
initially, i tot that she said that cos she wana make us feel excited so that we will listen attentively.. but guess wat?
i was so wrong..
cos indeed, 080606 is the day that God spoke to me..
i cant help but to thank god over and over again..
even b4 i fell asleep on the bed..

to say the truth...
i am so 'direction-less' b4 i went for the camp.
i seriously duno wat i am doing.
i dun even noe where and wat i am going to do!!
shall not elaborate thou..
however i can say that... due to my 'direction-less' feeling, my passion was decreasing day after day..
but yes!!!
God spoke to me... and it was crystal clear..
God ask me to check my motive..
and ok, my motive wasnt rite initially..
by God's grace, He corrected my motive.
now, i noe where i should head to and yups, my passion for God has increased!!
i noe why i do wat i do =)

i also ask God for a promise that i can claim..
as in, wat is one vision for this cg and myself??
God told me this....
"where ever u stepped ur feet on, u will bear fruit"
i was so so touched..
initially i doubted.
omg, me of little faith..
as i tik and tik, God reminded me of wat shirls prophecy when i was water baptised.
she prophecy that i am like a seed that disperse..
i will not only set my feet on one place, however, where ever i step my feet on, God will use me to create an impact and will bear fruit.
wah.. this prophecy sound so great mann..
and it tally with wat God told me in camp!
so yups, i kick myself over and over again for doubting.
i blive that God can use me greatly !!
God, thankiew for using me =)
i am so so so privilege

and hey folks... i noe wat is my big dream for god le!!
hahaha
but i will not tell u guys.
cos u all surly laugh at me one!!
i am pretty sure abt it! =p

oh yes, i lurve the games mann!
hahahaha
i like the concept of finding the murderer...
i tik everyone watch too much tv le..
wahahhahaha.
thou i noe that its jus a game and everyone was jus acting..
but i got the 'creepy' feel. wahaha
and u noe wat?
i reali crack my brain to figure who the murderer is....
hehehe
1st time so enthu for games
hahahaha

u noe... for the telematch..
i participate in blowing whistle.
the reason being is i dun wana lose my voice..
oh well, i lose it anyway.. =p
okay.. and u noe wat???
we forgot to eat the bread we bought in e morning..
i feel so weak and hungry!!
there is this part when i blew the whistle so many times...
i duno y.. i feel so tired in jus blowing that noisy thing.
and i went black out for 2 seconds..
quicky sat down and made a little prayer..
and i black out more den twice!!
but its all less den 2 seconds.
but i didnt tell anyone.. cos they will either laugh at me(cos blow whistle also can faint) or being over-reactive.
i drank green-tea and i feel so much better...
that is like my "holy-water"
wahahaha
and i keep complaining that i am VERY hungry......
wahaha.

my voice was gone..
thats the most irritating lar.
eh, reali leh.
i had FOUR ulcers.
hais.
even till now.
FOUR ulcers.
one is enough to cripple me already.
more ever its 4.
wahaha.
the worse part is not when i eat..
the worse part is when i brush my teeth!
tears will reali drop when i brush teeth..
sounds stupid.. nvm =)

God... i am jus too excited that its beyond words.
i am jus too privilege mann.
i am tingting.. an ordinary gal, hurt u many times, limited in skills and knowledge, sinful that i deserve hell, irritating at times and many more..
and u gave me the best plan ever...
and u promis me that i will bear fruits..
and u love me..
and u spoke to me ..
omg, y am i so privilege?
thank a million my lord.

God reminded me abt obedience too...

all along.. i tot i am obedient..

as in, wat i am told to do, i already done..

however, in camp..

holy spirit showed me how disobedience am i..

in my thoughts and many times i ignored the holy spirit when he prompted me to do something.

i was so sadden when holy spirit told me this...

i repented big time..

sorry god =(

i will do my best to obey the holy spirit!!

not for anyone;s sake but for my sake.. for god's sake =)

oh btw... the media corp came and interviewed me!
abt young blogger..
wahaha.
i didnt inform many ppl cos i dun wana them to watch that show.
i dare to blog in now cos that show is over!!
hahahahaha.
i didnt watch too..
cos i am in camp.
but yups, i dun dare to watch lar.
so paiseh..

ting has direstion and a promise frm God already!!
ting noe wats her big dream already!!!

oh ya, i forgot to talk abt shepherd's appreciation night..
hey gals, i am reali touched!
but u noe me well, i seriously duno how to express myself when i feel touch..
hahaha
so i duno how "monkey" i reacted that night.
when u guys affirmed me..
i feel like crying..
saw the tears in ur eyes and felt ur sincerity..
at that moment, i felt like i am the most blessed shepherd in hope.
lol
sound so drama, but its the truth!

thanks for follwing me as i follow jesus =p

i got the feeling that my sheep love me alot!
hahaa
call me thick face =p
bleahz!!
i said this cos they always make me feel so loved.
melting soon mann.
thanks for loving me sheep.
and i love u gals deep deep in my heart.
sometimes, i am ur fren...
sometimes, i am ur teacher..
sometimes, i am ur boyfriend
sometimes, i am ur mother...
sometimes, i am ur leader..
sometimes, i am ur ... hmms? cant tik le.. wahaha
i feel this way lar..
but many many times, u gals are like my frens cum child.
wahahaa

to hui ru.. i duno if this big bird will read my blog or not.
i am SO touch when i received ur gift!
this is an unexpected gift!
melted.
i miss u eh, hui ru..
u are one sheep that i ENJOY EVERY MOMENT WITH YOU.
u are the 1st NB that i follow up all the way till u became a CLA. haha
long process...
the card u wrote... i feel so blessed.
u still rmber wat we did arh?
hehehehe...
i wun forget esp the last shepherding we had..
we went sun tec de kenny roger.. rmber?
actually wana break the restructing news to u in a romantic place de, but due to my damn tummy..
i have to go toilet, so out of 'bo-bian-ness' we have to leave.
haha
to tik abt it.. so FUNNY.
lols
i love u=)

thats all folks.
didnt reali noe wat to say lar...
more to say actually...
but ... lazy!
buais folks.
wahahahaha.

btw..

eelee, i lurve u lots!

i am truely blessed to be ur sheep.

u have taught well in the camp.

i hope that u will love the gifts.

lurve ya =)

i look forward to mit u on tues!

cos i wana tell u wat God told me personally!!

lurve ya =)

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-06-06T03:13:00.000+08:00

everyone wana be heard.. isnt that true?

i'm glad that i have god, my full-time listener.

had a long letter to God.

i am too troubled to talk.

glad that i have told god the dark ares in my life.

it feels good to submit everything to him.

hais all in all, i felt that i am an unworthy child.

insignificant.

that is one of the most irritating word in my dictionary.

anyway, went for a hair cut today..

that damn shop, it sucks lar!

NEVER will i go back there again.

i promise.

hmpz!

camp is coming..

objectives yet set, bag yet packed, stuffs yet buy.

okay, i MIGHT be doomed.

erms.

haha

but yups, i pray that i will be one turning point of my life after this camp.

i am sick and tired of my lifestyle now.

i wana live differently.

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-06-04T13:19:00.000+08:00

oh well... duno how to start my entry today...
okay, its a saturday..
woke up early to watch super band...
alright, i lurve watching this kinda show. i also duno y..

was heavy hearted today..
i am blind..
i seriously tik i am blind today.
u noe y?
cos i am blind to see how blessed am i actually.
frankly speaking... i dun feel joyful at all.
i feel..... sianzation?
that was this morning..

in the train..
God reali convict me..
revial and rising up to do something came across my mind..
and yes, in that 45mins journey, i made a decision to get out of comfort zone and i have to do something abt this stagnacy in this cg and even in my heart.
its time for me to do something....

went to service with a decision that i mus mit God today.
revial mus happen in my heart today.
and guess wat?
today's topic was abt revial..
and it seems like God design this service especially for me...
hehe.
worship God and i've met God =)
argh, time jus went too fast, i wish there will be longer time to worship...
god reminded me of JOY.
i always tell myself that probs are good...
cos it means that success is nearer.
but dumb me, i actually dun feel grateful at all!!
yups, i am a human too, its normal to be discourage, its normal to feel lousy when things dun go my way.
however, i am not any other human u can find on the street...
cos i noe e source of joy..

sometimes, we jus need to open our eyes to see.
to see how bless we are.
to noe that we are actually on the winning side.
the situations wasnt that bad isnt it?
y am i behaving as if its the end of everything?
i thank God that he made me realised this simple fact.
the fact that i am not in the dead end,the fact that everything will be okay and also the simple fact that God is on my side.

actually if u wana God to help u to open ur eyes to see wat God has instore, to see things in hope, u have to mit God 1st..

true?

yeah, the preaching..
it refreshes me!!!
the wonders of expectancy frm God =)
my God is an awesome god.
HE IS !!

went DMM, and wat eelee taught, refreshes me again.
wah...
now i truely understand wat it means by the word of God is like the honey to our soul..
hahahha.
i feel Good now =)
if old granny sarah can give birth at the age of 100 plus, if moses can depart the red sea, if the donkey can speak, if the lame can walk, the dead can be risen....
den y cant God do his miracles and wonders in my cg?
wat else can God not do?
if he has already given me His only son, wat else can God not give me?
hey God, its an insult to u when i doubt u.
i'm sorry God.
west a two shall be the cg that God create miracles, do wonders.
we shall be the witnesses.
i dun wana a steady cg without experiencing God, i rather the cg to experience storm and den experience God, and also witnessing His wonders.
ok, i noe, this is a dangerous prayer..
even i was typing this, i have to urge to backspace everything and pretend i've said nth.
but God, i wana experience u, i wana be stronger.

went to jes's hse for steamboat.
very nice =)
i like the feeling of fellowshiping and this family feel.
joyce phoebe xiao cindy jolene wei wei were there too!
fun fun fun =)
the auntie is so friendly!!
yups!

went home with joyce..
was telling joyce that actually in the past when she ask me if i wana receive holy spirit..
thou i ans her "yes"
but in my heart.. it was.. " i can say dun wan meh??"
haha
and i scared they will start chanting to me if i say no, so i have to say yes.
wahahaha.
and many many things, i started off with funny intentions and motives.
i tik most ppl are lidat lar.
wahaha
and joyce replied me... "but God still dote u alot"

i duno y, when i hear this, i feel so happy.
it feels so good to hear that. haha.
its obvious that i am so blessed by God in my life and ministry.

God nv fail me before...

thanks jency for the mp3 landyard(i spell wrong?)
its comes to me handy!
i was so troubled, cos i no money to buy it.
haha
eh, i feel so loved k!
thanks leh.
duno how to express.
but ya, thanks!

in conclusion..
i am charged up to do great things for God!
i must not feel defeated.
cos i am not defeated.

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-06-02T00:50:00.000+08:00

oh well.... actually i reali wana slp already..
i read email till can fall asleep..
dead tired.
but i still wana post, cos today is my another crazy day!
fyi, e reason y i lurve blogging is cos i have short-term-memory!
i tend to forget the things that i've done.
so.. yeah,this is jus like my 'memory bank' =)

woke up not as early as expected.
but yeah.. wasnt too late for the guitar class =)
was actually reluctant to go for the class.
due to... i'm craving for more sleep!
but yeah, dun wana have complaining spirit..
was actually thinking that i'm already very blessed that i have a chance to go for guitar class.. so i've learn to appreciate =)
and tell u guys!
i lurve the class today!
learned 4 more new chords and i was reali amazed by the wonders of that piece of wood.
i reali wana be a good guitarist, so that i can be a blessing to my cg =)

went for cg and guess wat...
the attendence was damn lousy.
argh.. went west coast anyway...
once again, i behaved like a kid and played.
its rare to see ting being crazy in terms of playing.. =)

i wonder....
how is it possible to have fun without the rest of e cg with us?
i'm not trying to say that we should gather together to cry when our cg members didnt attend cg.
but by right, we shouldnt ignore the fact that they are not with us.
isnt that an incomplete family?
and how to ignore when there is this family member is not with us?
how to ignore?
not attending cg or another other things seems more and more common already.
but this is a sign of danger.
how to ignore?
oh well, i can ignore, unless i dun bother..
but i do care!
if i said this is my family, i mean it.
and when this family member is missing, its weird for me not to bother, cos is not possible to do so =)

2006-06-01T02:53:00.000+08:00

a speedy post will do.
okay,this time is for real..
wahahaha.
my eyelid's dropping..
*yarwns*

today, i did something that i feel like kicking myself.
i tot that exams start at 12.30pm..
but its actually 12pm!!
to make things worse, i arrived at 12.35pm.
didnt noe that i am THAT late, i went to the class and wanted to start doing the paper..
saw the tcher mumbling.. but i duno wat she's trying to say.
so i simply ignore her..
she came and told me that i wun have enough time to finish the paper...
i was wondering y... and soon, i realised that i was not jus 5mins late but 35 mins late!
so.... i have to join the other class, and their paper was 1 hr later!!!!
omg, gonna rot rot rot !
wat a stupid mistake...
blur as usual.

watched the 8pm show today.
the wedding show.
the 'quan yi feng' host one..
yups
watched and i teared!!!
wait wait.. its not a touching movie.. not a dying scene..
and i teared!!!
was very touch by the ppl, cos they gave quan yi feng a supprise wedding..
duno how to elaborate thou.
and i am very touch..
ok now, i *poof* off my chalet wedding plan le..
haha.
now i noe, a wedding cannot be so 'sup sup sway'
hehe.

2006-05-30T03:21:00.000+08:00

new discovery of ting today...
ting is weird.
hmmmms.
la la la la.

ipod nano !!
yeah =)
lurve it !
broke again!!
great singapore sale!!
i dun tik i will shop for it, since i am broke.

God..
help me not to be distracted.
help me to please u with my thoughts.

argh, geraldene has a gf!!
and her gf is someone i noe.
oh well, she is a les.
i knew it.
haha.
i am so so so sad!!
anyway, if u watch tv u will noe her!
if u noe me well, u'll noe that i lurve her to bits!
she is talented and pretty =p
argh. saddening.
ok, i'm being boliao.
wahahhaas

exams !
God help me =)
thanks !
glad that i made some frens in skool today =p

ii wana be charged up for u, lord.

2006-05-28T14:03:00.000+08:00

today, i did alot of thinkings..
as in, everywhere i go, may it be waiting for food to be served, walking around etc etc, i am deep in thoughts..
i can literally hear myself talking in my heart.
i am reali thinking...
oh well, i'm not very sure if this is kinda rare, but after all these deep thoughts, i was kinda expecting great things to happen and also, i have a sudden urge for a new start in my life.

a few weeks ago... eelee ramdomly asked me a question that somehow create a stir in me.
thou it was quite ramdom, but i kept thinkin abt it..
she asked me wat is my biggest dream for god.
today, this question pop out again..
btw, in northwest meet, we learn abt God's promises..
and i was thinking.......
if i dun start to dream for god..
if i dun wana attempt great things for god...
den how on earth would God bring me to his promise land?
cos there isnt a promise land in e 1st place when i decide not to do anything abt it.
so i will be deprive frm many many great stuffs that God has instored for me !
and and and, i want to experience God in a real way..
hmmms, there is no fake way anyway.. oh well.
but yea, i wana grow alot more in God.
i reali want to.

i rmber when i was leading west C in the past..
i used to have a vision, a big dream for god.
and it reali drives me on..
i can clearly rmber the days when i feel like giving up, and God reminded me again and again of the vision and his promises.
sadly, there are still no breakthrrus in the group..
i came to a point assuming that e promises that God promise me wun come to pass.
its jus a dream, its jus an unreachable goal.
and mayb its jus another empty promises..
and guess wat happen?
during one of the worship session in camp,
God gave me a crystal clear msg....
he said.. "i will NEVER break my promises,i'll NEVER lie"
i was like... in the 'omg' mode when i heard God speaking thru shirls.
and yeah, since den, i noe that once God promise me, he will make sure it come to pass...
God, i hold u responsible for wat u've said! hor?

was also thinking abt 2005.
oh well, thou it's already histroy, but i rmber saying in one of my entries that if i can choose, i wouldnt wana go thru year 2005.
cos 2005 is reali a pruning year for me !
but for now, i wana say....
even if i can choose, i will choose to go thru 2005.
cos 2005 is the year that i have no choice but to rely on God.
a year that i truely understand that the plans that i've planned, cant work if its only base on my own wisdom.
a year where by i experience God alot, kinda a turning point of my life..
actually there are alot alot, cant share all.
jus that, i became stronger since den!
yups, its history le.
shall not live in the past.
opps btw, i said all these cos i rmber having a big dream for God last year.
but i already forgot wat exactly it was.
so i cant consider that a big dream now.
i am a loser hur?
oh well, i wana think carefully...
so that i will still rmber even when i am old.
my dream for god.

hello darling daddy!!
i wana walk into ur promise land =)
i wana claim them !
i wana experience u!! yes YOU!
i wana be part of ur glorious plan and promises.
yeah God.
i wana be the witness of how faithful u are.
i wana be the one that went thru the process of dreaming and work it out to let the dream dun jus remain as dream.
okay God!! Me!! tingting!

another food for tot ..
i guess i am too sensitive other little things.
its like, i jump into conclusion too quickly without finding out the truth.
as in, i tried to read ppl's mind..
but as u all noe, we can NV read ppl's mind.
and lidat, i assumed things!
argh.
and to say the truth, its dumb!
y i say so....?
can u imagine u, hurting urself emotionally and its all bcos,u assume ppl think this way.
let me tell u one simple truth...
i am not always right, we are not always right !
revolution hur?
so i am always reminding myself....
i cannot assume how ppl think and end up hurting myself
its dumb, its reali dumb !

i truly hate this word "assuming"
due to bad experience abt it.
share a puny bit.
there is this person THOUGHT that i dun trust her, since den, she refused to trust me.
another person, THOUGHT that i am angry, and she scream at me for god knows reason.
and many misunderstandings and mistakes occurs when "assuming" comes in.
and of cos, i did this stupid mistake MANY times too!
i rmber i ASSUME that my sheep knows.. and u noe wat?
no one knows.. so end up, everything was in chaos.
omg, its jus disastrous!

ohh..... and also.
i reali wana say that i appreciate eelee alot =)
i am not very good at saying words that will moved ppl to tears.
i am lousy at words !
jus wana say that, God favours me by giving me eelee as shepherd =)
i lurve u shepherd !

and and and..

today aaron told me this... "i lurrve you!" and many others words that i cant reali catch it.

oh btw, aaron is my brother... duhh.

i was kinda shocked but touch.

i am still trying to figure out wat exactly he said after the 'i love u'

cos she speak in a real fast speed due to time constrain.

and i reali wonder.... is that a forfeit for him or ...?

hahaha, nvm..

i feel very blessed =)

i was thinking...
my grp is growing too slow!!!
stuck at 12 for god knows how long...
damn long!
can we break it soon ?
15 ppl!!!!!
dun underestimate God's abilities k!
we are not able, TRUE.
but God is able.
i duno wat to say.
catch my heartbeat?
15 !
we should move on frm 12 mann.
its time
PASSION.
hey, passion!
got it?
passion cannot be dead!
its a boo boo and hoo hoo to allow the passion to die off.
its our responsibilities to renew ourselves.
no matter how sucks the circumstances are, we will have capacity to renew our soul =)
passion cannot be dead.
blive God for great things.
dun limit God.
=)
if u dare to blive God, God will give it to us!
its OURS anyway, its jus the matter of time =)
wahahaha.
so make it soon!
lols

ohh!! long post!!
as i say...
today is the day where my brains are working hard.
hehe!

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-26T01:46:00.000+08:00

argh.

today is.... a.... bad day?

i had a bad fall !!

how can that happen to me??

let me tell ya wat happen.......

as u guys noe..

it was raining..

i was abt to enter the MRT....... i slipped and fell !!

my left feet went into the gap between the train and the platform..

and it was exactly the position where i had my operation!

very painful.....

i was about to cry in the train..

but i dun dare..

i walk all the way to the next cabin...

too paiseh liao..

but yeah it hurts...

when i reach, i showed my cg members my poor feet..

and it was swollen...

reali swollen.

now, i cant walk properly!

argh. =(

i duno if i should go see doc.

cos i am very worry that the pain and the swollen was actually blueblack.

den if i go & see doc, i would be making a big fuss over it..

oh well.... was in dilemma again.

okay... this was so..... embarrassing... isnt it?

had a big fall in mrt.

argh, to tik abt it.... it was rather funny hur?

oh no oh no....

i am so clumsy!

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-25T13:26:00.000+08:00

West A event.. moii caregroup!!
oh well, we look ugly. lols

so... this is the way they love me!!
fancy bullying me hur? =p

west A !! snow white =)
enjoy ourselves! =p

2006-05-25T02:31:00.000+08:00

Jency: " Hey!! i'm here to hao lian to u, i went jogging!!
haha.... and my reply to her is................
ting: "so.. wats the big deal?? wahaha!"
haha, i sound mean isnt it?
opps!! i'm sorry miss jency!
anyway, dear jency, jogging for once in the blue moon dun work lar!
u have to be consistant....
and i seriously doubt that u will be consistant in this.
wahahaa, actually, i confess that i wun either!!
jency, we are on the same boat.. blehz!
come on, prove me wrong!! yeah.

today, jency thinks that she can slim down abit bcos she went jogging...
today, i tik i can slim down abit too!!
not bcos i went jogging.. but all bcos i had diarrhoea..
argh..
was stucked in the toillet and yeah, i had a funny thought...
since my tummy is on the "clearing" process...
y dun all the fats and oils pass out together??
thats a 'might as well' thing wat.. lols
oh well, sound so uncivilised, but to say the truth, that's MOST woman's desire ok!

was down with flu and cold as well..
oh well, it seems that my physical body has broken down today..
be healed!! in jesus name..
for the diarrhoea part, if this can slim me down, wahaha, i'm fine with diarrhoea!!
jus that i dun wana poo on my pants and my butt to...
oh ok, its getting more and more off.

aiya, wat i said are actually craps.

cos for diarrhoea, the pain is unbearable.
okay God, ur will be done. amen =)

was doing the devotion today...
i was reminded of this song...
"consuming fire, fan into flame..a passion for your name"
and i start asking myself this question..
"y am i doing wat i am doing?"
to be honest, i took sometime to anawer this question..

actually why we do wat we do is all for the lost souls..
agree?
the purpose of having cg and service is more den having fun and satisfy ourselves.
its for the lost souls.
the purpose y we need renewal, is more den jus refreshing..
its so that we can get right with God, be charged up, to do God's work.
and God's work is always abt lost souls.
the purpose of shepherding is more den jus teaching the wog..
once we are right with God, we will catch his heartbeat.
and u noe wat? god's heartbeat is always for the people.
all in all, i'm trying to say that...
lets not be inward looking..
cg, service, shepherdings etc etc should not only exist for ourselves.
it should be a channel for the lost souls to connect back to God =p

weary,routine,drag,reluctant,complains...etc etc..
all these wun exist if there is PASSION burining in us.
without passion, serving God wouldnt be joyful, it will be a chore.
and we noe it clearly that serving God is not a chore, its suppose to be joyful.
God, renew this passion in us.
God, i wana be on fire for u!!
help me to serve u with passion and with joy =)
i dun wana lead my life as a routine.
it will be so meaningless, remind me y i do wat i do..

-living for jesus is not a part time job-

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-24T01:52:00.000+08:00

God understands.

He noe me inside-out.

How can he not understand?

the little thoughts that ran thru my mind..

the stir in my heart.

my little discomforts.

the way i feel.

God understand them all..

simply bcos, he noe me inside out...

how can the creator not understand the creation?

simply bcos i am his creation, and he is my creator.

how can he not understand?

how is that possible?

He knows me inside out..

the little details in me.

may it be in my heart, my physical body , my spiritual body, my mind..

he knows everything abt it, even there is this puny little sand went into me, HE KNOWS !

bcos he knows me inside out.

bcos he is my creator and i am his creation..

bcos he bothers and care abt me...

bcos he is attentive to me.

he simply loves and adore me =)

inside-out.

i am transparent b4 God.

cos he already knows.

i am proud to be his creation =)

i am blessed, i am loved...

i am in awe.

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-24T00:56:00.000+08:00

Monday..

ting's morning...

OVERSLEPT!!
again =(
suppose to mit the little darlings 10.30am at lot 1..
but i woke up at 10.30am.. argh.
i felt reali bad abt it and i FLY over..
reach cck at 11.30am and ya, that was rather fast =p

ting's noon..

went basketball court and duhh, we played basketball =p
yes, if u are rubbing ur eyes to make sure u've not seen e wrong thing....
let me tell u this... dun doubt !!
haha...
i reali played bball ! =p
oh well...
actually its more to.. walking ard the bball court..
wahaha.
i have been strolling ard the court during the match!
i am there jus to add on to e numbers.
i am pretty sure abt that !!
wahahahahaa..... this is another duhh thing to all =p
blehz !

went to playground and played blind mice.
wahaha.
i guess this is another incredible fact to u guys.
fancy seeing a 18 year old gal playing blind mice in the playground..
however, i seriously tik that childhood games is the best.
i lurrve to play childhood games..!! =p
"wats the time now mr wolf" anyone?
omg, u can literally see me hanging myself to avoid being catch..
when i am the blind mice, i took very long to walk one step forward, due to fear and insecurity.. let alone catching them!!
if not for xiao xuan losing grip n fell, i guess i am still the blind mice one hour later!
oh well, thats not a very proud thing thou.

it was raining and we did many dumb but meroriable stuff..
we ran frm the park all e way to lot 1..
BARE FOOTED.
fyi, it was ard 2 bus stops away.. i guess.
its quite a long distant...
its fun =)
never in my life i ran in public under the rain bare footed and enter the shopping center drenched
many eyes were on us but at that point of time..
image doesnt reali matter. =p

went mac and we played true or dare..
opps, its only dare.
hahaha
cant imagine us being so wild.
we literally heck care our image and played like nv b4 =)

all in all, i tik its fun to be crazy =)

ting's evening...

played with dogs.
damn cute can?
lols.
at that point of time, i wanted a dog so much.
but yeah, i noe...
keeping a dog is not as easy as i tik.
thats for sure !

went home and i noe, i stinked !
i dun dare to sit at mrt or bus.
was very very concious....
hey, i reali stinked ok.. haha

ting's mid-night..

greive.
my hamster die =(
was so shocked.
cos a few mins of his death, he was still walking ard.
cry and cry...
it has been for sometime that i cry myself to slp mann.
din reali dare to call anyone cos for sure,they will call me foolish.
but thank God, i have cindy =)
thanks gal.. hehehe.
i feel like crying again =(
stop laughing if u are laughing man.
i noe its dumb thou.

TUE

wake up.... with that 'heavy' feeling..
went to look at my another hamster.
she was eating...
a few mins later...
i went for a second look..
she was dead !!!!
this time, no more tears.
jus stunned.
i am reali puzzled leh...
their death is so sudden lar..
i still cant figure out why mann.

i duno y news spread like wildfire..
it seems like everyone knows that my hamsters die.
and everyone was like.............
laughing?
hais, i reali wonder...
wats so funny mann.

actually if i am an outsider, i would laugh at someone who cry for a hamster.
mayb i would ignore that person.
but but but.....
its jus too bad that i'm 'that person'
yupps.
am i kid-dish?
why is that nobody cares when i am so upset abt the hamster?
that insignificant.
ok lar, not nobody lar..
can see that jia hui they all quite sad when i told them abt it.
ok, i am done with my insignificant sharing abt my hamster.

went sentosa.
okay, supposed to sun-tanned.
but apparently it was an unsuccessful one.
1-the sun wasnt that powerful.
2-we were there for a little while..
but my face look red!!
hehe.
not that red, i like that pinkish colour on my face =)
healthy look.

NOW

- upset abt hamster.
hai ya, i took too long to forget abt it le.
- sianzation
tml is wed again
4 hrs of accounts!
save me!! anyone?

oh ya..
today i learn abt different styles of leadership.
my application is that i wana find out wat is my style, wat is my strength..
so that i can capitalise on my strength =)
so..... do u noe wats ur strength ??
u have to noe it mann.

ii am reali blessed by jia hui...
she has difficulties coming to sat service this week..
however, she was not a passive player in this.
she took the extra miles to ask again..
and and, she reali has the heart and she wants to go !!
i am so blessed to noe abt it mann =)
she told me that she dun wana miss cg and service.

ting-jia hui: " service so fun, dun understand y some ppl refused to go..."
jia hui-ting: " bcos they haven try mah..."

wahahaha....
yes, if u haven taste the goodness of God, how do u noe that God is good?

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-21T01:58:00.000+08:00

ting's sat...
wat a happening sat..
hehes.

didnt have a good nite slp last nite...
i duno y !! i have difficulties in falling asleep..
and and and... i cant slp at peace.
and this morning, i woke up alarmed !
received an sms that goes like this....
" ting, i dun have guitar leh..."
something lidat...
i seriously dislike this kinda last min situations mann.
haha
but yea, thank God. found a guitar at last =)

hur hur hur, i reach somerset at 10.30am today !!
i lurve the feeling of being early..
cos i can walk in the speed that i enjoy and not rush
i hate the feeling of rushing..
hehes.
but amazing thou, i board on da train at 10am.

went to starhub.. and yes!
i look like a zombie.
fyi, i slept for less den 3 hours.
grrrrrr....
was making a prayer in my heart...
"God, give me strength... God, have some colour on my face!"
haha.

didnt eat anythimg.
got 2 reasons.
one- i am broke !
two- my tummy have this weird feeling...
ii am very touch by phoebe, who blessed me with a cup of hot milo.
wah !!
din reali noe how to express how i feel mann.
opps, btw, i am not very good at expressing, esp when i am touched..
reali !!
side track abit.. i was telling many ppl that i very scared when i got older, my partner did some romantic stuff to me, that will melt my heart that kind, i duno how to react sia !!
wahahaha..
but thankie phoebe =)
that hot milo warm my tummy & it feels comfy =)

practiced worship with yuqian..
and this reali brighten my day.
it feels good to worship God mann.

the feeling is so awesome, to start my day off with a worship =)
thou its jus a practice. =)

after service we had our west a meet !
played with flour and it was so gross mann
many ppl complained that they nearly puke.
i reali wonder.. so do u guys enjoy the games?
wahahaha
i tik its way better den those toilet games or wacko mann.
this is memorable can? blehz !
oh well, initially i was eased when i noe i am the game master, i can avoid doing all those gross stuffs.
but..BUT.. i still kana flour anyway, due to the cheeky nature of the ppl.. yups.
wahahaha.

as u all noe, i obviously noe nuts abt guitar !!
i didnt noe that the chords was a total mistake until de hui told us.
opps, i am talking abt the worship leading in west meet.
and it was very last min... i can feel like my soul gonna separate frm me le..
in simple language, i feel that my heart will stop beating anytime and jus die there.
this is one of the few times that i will feel nervous for worship.
not nervous, more to terrified !

finally its worship time...
cry..
its a chaos.
i can feel that my heart was....... dropping?
is that the word to describe?
wahahaha
and i told God..
"God..... help me !"
and yups. i calm myself down...
i worship god..
the only way to minister ppl in worship is to be ministered by God.
if not... how?
so yeah.

went to mit my gals.
in general, my grp's momentum was kinda low, moral low as well.
i reali duno wat to do !!
one of the reason was also bcos i am discouraged as well.
so said nth and we prayed in spirit for some time....
pray for a fresh touch etc.
praise God, there was a divine exchange =)
after that few mins, we are so refreshed !
can hear ppl tearing, can see the desperation of the ppl.
the wonders of seeking God, the wonders of coming to God in expectations =)

for now, i am dead sleepy now.
i HOPE that i can slp real early..
no flipping on bed anymore pls !

its ok to take a break, my dear gals =)
lets us rest in God's hands =)
heart at peace, heart at rest.

jus wana say that.... if we put our focus back to God, e probs will be smaller.

how many of the ppl knows this simple fact abt magnifying on God and not on probs, but how many ppl actually putting it into practice?

trust God!! he is able! come on !
focus on God, not sweeping everything under the carpet, not dwelling.
but come to God and deal with the issue.
have victory over it.
focus on God, and things will not be that chaos.
focus on God, not urself, not the prob not others.
GOD the almighty, wat us one thing that he cannot do?
-none.

memorable

momentum

desperation

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-20T02:10:00.000+08:00

anxiety.

That familiar indescribable feeling.

i need a break !

i need peace.

how i wish............................
nth will bother me anymore..
how i wish...............
u can make me vanish into thin air.

2006-05-19T00:59:00.000+08:00

be serious.. would u?
it jus breaks my heart.. when u treat this as a trifling matter.
argh.

God..
i'm sorry that i didnt lead my life as exciting as it meant to be...
i have tons and tons of things to tell u, yups..
but its jus within u and me..
our litle conversations.
=)

u created me to love me.
u created me to lead an exciting life.

DAY 20 - devotions

DOING THE IMPOSSIBLE

i find this pretty interesting..

- A church bulletin captured this reality in the following prayer: "so far today, Lord, i've done all right. i haben gossiped; i haben lost my temper; i haben been greedy. grumpy, nasty, selfish, or overindulgent. i'm very thankful for that. But in a few moments, Lord, i'm going to get out of bed. And from then on, i'm going to need alot of help." -

- whatever u face today, u dun face alone. Christ's spirit is there with u. Count on it! -

- wat is the difference between overcoming probs thru mere human determination and overcoming thru working with the holy spirit? -

the abv points triggles my heart.

all in all...
i jus wana say that..................
i wana lead my life as how God want it to be.
its tough thou.

give me the strength.
i need faith and hope.
most importantly, i need joy.

DO NOT TURN BACK.
however, i somehow regreted.
but 2nd thought, i noe God has his purpose.
and also, God is giving me a chance a to impact ppl
God is giving me time !
to make it or break it.
God, help me.. k? =)

please u with my life..
i dun wana end my day with regrets and disappointments.
the only strategy is to live life with u, stay close with u.
right?

2006-05-18T02:16:00.000+08:00

the reason y u haben been an overcomer is u haben realised the one that is in u is greater ! =)

2 KINGS 6 : 15-17

15 When the servant of the man of God got up and went out early the next morning, an army with horses and chariots had surrounded the city. "Oh, my lord, what shall we do?" the servant asked.
16 "Don't be afraid," the prophet answered. "Those who are with us are more than those who are with them."
17 And Elisha prayed, "O LORD, open his eyes so he may see." Then the LORD opened the servant's eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha

John 16 : 33

33"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-18T01:46:00.000+08:00

ROMANS 8 : 5-9

5Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires.
6The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace;
7the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so.
8Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God.
9You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ.

extracted frm devotion say 19.

i simply love these verses.

sheer willpower is not enough...
amen =)

if u have trusted God, u would have saved urself a lot of needless worry.

freedom.
are u set free?
or......... still caught in the same old routine and probs?
be set free by God =)
we are overcomers

PHI 4 :8

8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things

means... other den that.. dun tik !! wahahaa
negative thoughts , needless thoughts .. shoo !

2006-05-18T01:33:00.000+08:00

No Time

I knelt to pray,
but not for long,
I had too much to do.
Must hurry off and get to work,
For bills would soon be due.

And so I said a hurried prayer,
Jumped up from off my knees,
My Christian duty now was done.
My soul could be at ease.

All through the day
I had no timeto speak a word of Christ to friends
They'll laugh at me I feared.

No time, no time,
too much to do
That was my constant cry.
No time to give to those in need
At last it's my time to die.

And when before the Lord I came
I stood with down cast eyes.
Within his hands he held a book,
It was the Book of Life

God looked into his book and said
Your name I cannot find.
I once was going to write it down
But never found the time.

- Msgr. Lawrence Luciana

thanks hui ru for sending me =)
wahahhahaa...
actually i have lotsa this kind of stories, attempted to blog it, however, it look like one BIG CHUNK .. wahahha..
so forget abt it .
blehs =p

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-17T13:42:00.000+08:00

let me show u wat the lord has done to west a two.. =)

let me show u wat is life transformation all abt..

let me show u how real God is .. =)

let me show u something that reali melt my heart and cant stop giving thanks !!

here i go..

ripped frm cindy's blog..

I went to Tings hse in the morning for meeting and also planned to stay overnite there. I was kind of looking forward for it. I wake up very early to get prepared. HeexWe planned this meeting called Seed Meet I shared that I was being motivated by this new plan. It really spurs me on. Ting, also mention that its time for problems and breakthrough. Yeah! More breakthroughs, more and more! I want to grow more in God

Waking up in the morning I went to meet my sheep; Jocasta. I was tremendously touched by her. She knew that she wad late for shepherding and she took the initiative to take cab. That cab fare cost her $11+. Moreover, her dad gave her onli $10 for lunch.

Ripped frm jia hui's blog..

before der sat i vrey happy can go seed meet..hahas..so fun...love my one and only sherperd forever!!!*smuacks*
LOOKING FORWARD FER DER COMING CARE GROUP AND SERVICE!!!!!

Ripped frm Jia wan's blog..

nnw everydae i`m doing quiet tyme! i`m so gladd wif myself.
i dunt wanna miss out my personnal tyme wif mie nnd god. =D

eu nno. doing quiet tyme is simply wonderful.
speaking tu god. hyiem nnd eu onli.
denn hyie replied eu thru bible.
its jus let eu feel so wonderful!!
trust mie. i`ve tried it. eu shld too.!!

looking forwardd tu tmr.!!
caregroup ;; shepherding ;; ANOTHER family gathering.!!

Ripped frm wan ling's blog..

GOD ii realy realy wan to recive
HOLLY SPIRIT

GOD was withb me
everrityme when ii was alone
GOD was the one withb me
dderhx llorhx x]]....

Ripped frm jes's blog..

arghh!! ii toldd tiingg.. ii wiL fiind more seeds!!! evenn now deyy all hav withered.. ii will still continue findd more... god.. ii will nv giiv up!! tishh week cannot.. nexx weekk still will go

! ii wanna b a cL soon! tuu takk care of eur sheeps=) ii wann tu share eur gospel tuu everyyone.. eur testimonyy!! tuu da whole worldd!!=) eu arhh da one!!

wahahaha.

i thank God for his wonders =)

Fastest Growing CG
YWA2
They grew from 4 to 10 people. This was supposed to be a pioneering cg but didnt see growth for a long time. They were about 4-5 people for many months and the people in the CG were not as united. I remembered in one Service, there will only 3 people in Service attendance. I met up with these 3 people and had to address the commitment and unity issue. During that time, the CL, was working alone. We were on the verge of combining this CG with other CG. But thank God, the members responded and started to work. Within just 4 months, we see 10 people in this CG and 50% of them are from sec 1. Now the members worked very hard, going the extra mile to retain these new believers. Praise God!

thankiew God ! =)

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-17T02:36:00.000+08:00

[- Romans 7 :14-25 -]

14We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin.
15I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.
16And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good.
17As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me.
18I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[a] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.
19For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to dothis I keep on doing.
20Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.
21So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me.
22For in my inner being I delight in God's law;
23but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members.
24What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?
25Thanks be to Godthrough Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God's law, but in the sinful nature a slave to the law of sin.

Devotions ; Day 18
GET OFF MY BACK

in you, i have freedom.
in you, i am set free.
in you, i found peace.
in you, i found love
in you, i no longer comdcondemn myself.
in you, i found forgiveness.
in you, i found grace.

as i say, many many times, i cant help it but to detest myself..
that's due to my sinful nature.
but yeah...
many many times, i'm amazed by God
his Grace.
i cant help me but to be thankful
thankiew God.

ur understanding..
ur patient..
ur love, unconditional love..
ur grace..
ur peace..

amazing grace... who saved a wretched like me..

thankiew God.
i dun deserve all these.
i reali dun.

such love, such grace..
such an undeserved grace..
why do ppl still turn away?
becos they are ungrateful.

so.. who says that christian life is a boriin life?
so.. who says that life in his kingdom is a burden?

we are so so privilege !! did u realise that? =)
its a boo boo to say... "pls sacrifice to serve God"
its a privilege.
God is perfectly fine if u choose not to take part in his plan.
god doesnt need us anyway.
but why did God, not only once, but many many times ask us to serve, ask us to take part in His plan?
all bcos, God dun wana us to miss out something big.

and also, bcos he love us..
he is giving us this privilege, God jus dun wana us to miss out wat he has for us.

I LURVE YOU GOD !!

privilege

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-16T23:31:00.000+08:00

some thoughts that ran thru my mind..

am i too defensive?
am i?
am i not?

should i do it?
if i do it, i might lost a fren and invite many troubles that i dun wana go thru.
if i dun do it, it might hurt both parties.
so... should i?
God, teach me wat to do.

God make me disappear now..
would u?

i am imperfect.
if u guys are looking for a perfect leader...
sorry, i will fail u.
for sure !
i hope that u guys will follow the wog, follow me as i follow jesus.
not my short-comings.
for my part, i will strive to be someone better.
For God's sake, for my sake and for my ppl sake.
i wont compromise anything for the fact that i am a sinner..
i wana give my best, for god =)
but for ur part, pin-pointing me doesnt help.
y not do a health check for ur own?
follow leaders as they follow christ.
cos no leader is perfect.
got it?

i wana grow also =)
understand?
i am not doing nth.
got it?
yups !

2006-05-16T02:17:00.000+08:00

a speedy post will do.. (i suppose??) wahahaha
i have mixed feelings now.
actually dun reali noe why.
however, i dun exactly duno why =)

oh well. millions sorry to jency and joyce. i broke that diet covenant many times.
nowadays i ate alot ! and all with family..
jus so weird that i have ALOT of family gathering nowadays.
and yups, i have 2 seperate incomplete families, and this is why i have more gatherings.
wahahha.
ting, SELF-CONTROL !

ipod nano ! have a chance to win it. but its a tough decision, should i take part of that dumb promotion thingy? wahahaha.. but.. its ipod nano leh ! =x

actually, i had a self-discovery.
i am a "avoiding" person.
and this is so so so.... sick.
actually i am kinda extream.
haiz, duno how to say.
jus wana say that, i dun reali like many many things that is happening, but yeah, i pretended that nth is wrong.
hur,u think i am reali ok abt it? u tik its a joke?
i wanted to treat it as a joke too, but sometimes, that is jus not the case.
i am affected.
hmmms, dun be too sensitve abt wat i jus said. =p

oh my.. eugene irritate aaron too much that.... when i knocked at aaron's door, he scream damn loud...
"DONT DISTURB ME LAR!!!!!!!!!!!!"
scare mii !!!!! didnt noe that i reali sound like eugene. wahahhahaa
omg, was abit pissed but yea, i noe its jus another misunderstanding.
haha

2006-05-14T23:36:00.000+08:00

yups.
a few thanks giving points =)

i thank God for cindy. i enjoy my friday alot ! that "game" was jus a tot while i bath, wahahaha... and it became our tool to share deep ! so divine, it mus be God mann. wahaha.. yea, read ur blog, i was very very happy to see wat u typed. and yups, we are more like frenz =) got to noe u more and i look forward to another overnight !! wahahaha love u to bits ! yups !
i thank God for my gals !! jes, phoebe and cindy. all of ur passion for God, for this cg =) breakthru in west A 2 and ii hope that west a 2 wun exist soon and very soon cos we are movin on to a unit soon! =) alright, seed meet. wahaha. lets continue to grow and grow ! its time for new dynamic in this grp le =) do u noe that we are very blessed to be the history maker in west a 2? hehes. miracles and breakthru will come ! amen !
i wana thank God for.... God !! wahahaha. yeah ! jia hui can go camp !! was very very very happi when i receive this news ! jia hui, dun worry that we will ps u lar, u are already part of us, its gonna be uneasy without u!! wahahaha. xiao lion arh, lets pray that the rest of the AES gals can go too ! since God answerd ur prayer, God will answer their's too !! we pray together for them too k? hehe. God is good, isnt it ? =) i lurve u xiao lion. =)
thank God for the rest of the AES gals, plus others new Bs ! thankiew for trying hard to go camp, ii truely blive that God will help u guys de =) hey hey hey, dun mss out this camp!! reali !! trust that prayers reali works ! =p
thank god for...my family =)

thank God for a few more new clothes !! wahahaha.

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-11T00:27:00.000+08:00

another wed has past...
hmmmmms.
as u guys noe, i hate wed alot !
cos every wed morning, i will drag my feet to skool.
wahaha
hmmms, todays accounts lesson is kinda boriin?
lols.
but glad taht i have this gal sitting beside me.
i actually forgot to ask wats her name ! lols
actually i noe many ppl already, but i duno their names !
nv sit with him today, but yea, its still a 'can-make-it' lesson cos that gal is quite friendly =)
i nv crush him !! jus in case u guys are wondering.. its that i enjoy sitting with him cos he is interesting and friendly =)

the highlight of this borrin wed is....
i have shepherding with eelee !
yeah.
i was duper late.
sighs.
eelee ramdomly ask me a question
"wat is ur big dream for God?"
i said... "i wana lead a big big grp for God..."
eelee: " How big? wat is ur ideal number?"
ting:" i nv tot of this question b4..."
eelee: " dream a big dream for God, write it down or something, one day u will be supprise by wat God can do... "

now ting is wondering...
wat is one big big dream taht i have for God?
to lead 100 ppl? to see myself doing.... hmmms wat?
haha, i am totally clueless now leh
all i noe is i wana be someone that can impact others and lead a big big grp..
big bog grp means how big?
hmmmms.
i tik i have to pray and strat dreaming abt my big drem for Him !!
haha
i wana do great things for God.
things that i cant do it, only can do it by God's grace.
so that when one day, that dream came to pass, all glory to God alone.

so.... wats big dream should i dream?
errrrrrrr.........

-EPH 3 : 19-21-
19and to know this love that surpasses knowledgethat you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
20Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

so i cannot underestimate God wors.
can u see wat ting is doing for God in a few years down the road?
i reali pray that i wouldnt be e same as wat i am doing now.
i pray that it will be something that will amused me if i noe wats my future.
lols.
can? God... can?
hehehehe..

God bless me !!

yeah.

Daddy agree to hekp me and didi to pay $40 each for camp !!

wahahahahhahaha

i jus need to foke out $50.

praise God ! =)

and and and, daddy will give me extra $150 every month.

if i teach eugene... his skool work etc..

wah.

a great deal isnt it?

cos i shouldnt receive any rewards if i teach my own bro, but daddy reward me anyway !! yeah !

mother day is coming.

i wana draw a card for daddy.

cos he is my mother and father.

yups.

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-09T22:31:00.000+08:00

wahahaha
here i am blogging again !!!
actually i jus finish doing my devtions.
its talking abt prayers
it wrote this.......
prayer should be our 1st response-not our last resort.
hey, isnt this wat i blogged sometime ago? wahahaha
http://-tingg-.blogspot.com/2006_03_01_-tingg-_archive.html
go see the march 01 2006 entry.

Not only that, we dun pray abt the trouble very long or pause to consider wat the bible has to say abt our response to our prob. it's amazing, thou, wat can happen when we take time to pray abt the issue and listen to god speak thru his word. He will give us a fresh way to look at our situation, and help us to be more christ-like.
-ENCOUNTER day 11 (9may06)-

2006-05-09T00:43:00.000+08:00

There are alot of tmls..
the thing is.... there are how many tmls for me?
argh.
everyday counts.
every min, every sec... it counts.
its precious.
shant waste them.
they wun come back, not even if u cry hard.
yeah.
so.... ting gonna use her time wisely and make sure everyday counts =)
make sure, everyday is a fufilling day for me.
yupps !

2006-05-09T00:38:00.000+08:00

cant blive that i get pissed by little little things.
am i crazy or something?
tell ya wat happen. i am pretty sure that u guys will laugh ur head off.
i woke up, craviin for egg !!
it has been sometime since i ate an egg already.
and i realise that my hse no eggs!! not even one !!
so disappointed.
but reali eh, my hse got nth !!
i am damn hungry now.
daddy saw my irritation and gave me extra money to go out eat.
and the dumbest thing is i actually reject it!!
oh well, plainly bcos i am too lazy to go out to eat.
but i regret it anyway..
i reali crave for an egg !!!

but one little simple thing made me smile jus now.
auntie bought me a new tooth brush !!
very nice, pink colour one.
its the newest colgate 360degree tooth brush.
i duno y, i lurve my tooth brush alot !! =)

can say that its kinda happening mornin for me.
pisseed and a smile at the same time.
but but, my worry now is... i am going to town with jens later with 5 bucks !
argh.
i jus need one meal and it will be gone.
oh well.
but thankiew God anyway =)

2006-05-08T01:52:00.000+08:00

actually i had a dilemma if i should post this entry or not.
cos in this entry i wana give thanks or rather, take time to appreciate some ppl in my life =)
disclamer: if ur name is not there, doesnt mean that i dun bother abt u !! dun be too sensitive k? lol
so yea, here i go.

EELEE- shepherd !! i lurve u to bits ! hahaha. thanks for guiding me and also, thanks for being my listening ear as well =) u noe wat? i always look forward to mit u !! i am reali blessed to have a shepherd like u, cos u are someone that i noe u care for me =) thanks for investing in me and i reali appreciate it !! thanks for ur extra miles, esp my O level period and also the 'DAE' times. haha...... more lar, but cant name all, and also the gifts that u gave me =) wahaha. felt so loved. lurve u shepherd !!

JENCY- eh gal arh !!!! actually jus now when u msn me, trying to comfort me cos u noe that i am feeling upset abt my O level thingy, i am truely touched =) it reali warmths my heart when i see ur tag also. wahahaha. i reali hope to be ur fren eh, as in close frenz =) i reali love to spend time with u and also, wanna noe u more. hmmmmms. i tik that fri was so divine lar, but yea, dun wana stop there, wana build our friendship in a deeper way =) lurve u sister !! and and and, thanks for the slipper !! i wore it already. lolx !! thanks for investing in me too =p u are impt to me =)

CINDY- haha. u more or less noe wat i wana say le rite? lol. u are the 1st one to noe that u are impt to me!! i blive God places u in my life for a purpose. wahaha. reali miss the days when we laze ard at cck with a cup of bubble tea. lols. now things are different, we have lesser times le but i blive a real friendship is not abt the amt of time spent together, quality, not quantity. yups !! =) am reali glad to see u being a shepherd of 3. come on, be a CL for God =) i have alot to say,however, i feel funny to type again, the rest u noe le hor ?? lol. i lurve u sheep !

JOYCE- i tik u are one person that i wun forget for life mann. thanks for bringing me to noe God, wun forget how u retain me with a nose stud and a card. lols. wun forget how u bless me by topping up my ez link and buying that slipper.tahts when i truely understand wat it means by loving ppl =) wun forget that box of sweets when i 1st became a CL. i am always tear when i read the duper long letter that u wrote.. ( do u still rmber??) and, i still keep that box that u contain the sweets !! lols. i will nv forget how patient u are when u teach me maths and accounts. i tik God favour me by placing u in my life =) we squabble alot, however, i came to realise that u reali care for me !! =) and i do love u alot too =)

DEWEN - hey !! u are like a big brother to me =) and also like a shepherd to me when u were my UL. lols. eh, thanks for 'ta-han-ing' me for all my nonsense. esp the cny that incident. was reali amused that u are not angry at all. thanks for alwalys being there for me and thanks for appreciating me. jus realised that other den joyce, u are the another one that watch me 'grow up' hehehe. lurve ya =)

JES- my tall sheep !!!!!! hahaha. dun angry. blehz. its a joy to be ur shepherd. u are so teachable, so passionate. eelee was affirming u on sat, saying that u are reali very passionate, u are always fighting to share ur testi abt God's goodness in ya life =) i am not supprise that God will use u in a great way !! i enjoy spending time with ya =) hahaha, sometime i admit that i am abit fierce to u, wahhaha, but sheep, i reali love u eh, reali wana see u grow, see u to be more mature. thanks for being so hospitable, always open up us hse for us =) thanks for supporting me. u play an impt role in this cg =) jia you gal, u have great potential. and and and, thanks for being faithful in doing stas, collecting tithings and shepherding ur sheep =) u are a good shepherd to all of them =) i lurve u !!!!

PHOEBE- hey sheep, glad taht our relationship has grown closer =0 u are one sheep that loves challenges and always wanting a breakthruu. noe that u are trying hard and also, thanks for supporting me !! thanks for ur purple pen and also thanks for being frank to me =0 i appreciate wat u have done and yea, u are impt !! =p i love u sheep =p

SHUZ and JEREL- i miss u very very much !! i reali duno wat to say, reali alot alot alot to say ! jus wana tell u guys that i look forward to catch up with u guys. i miss u i miss u i miss u !!!!!

GORDON- still dun understand y we can crap for such a long time. haha.. hey jus wana thank u for spending time with me, as in msn.lols. ienjoy chatting with ya !! i still rmber that time when u noe that i am damn sad ( that sat when i cry.. u rmber??) haha... u kept saying things trying to comfort me or something. aiya i forgot le lar. but nvm, i tik u rmber, cos u have wonderful memories. lols. hey dude, stusy hard for ur Os, at the same time, strive to be a CL for God!! come on =)

squabble

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-07T04:13:00.000+08:00

oh well, jus wana post abt my today. =)
wasnt too bad =) wahaha

met qiu lian and gordon on train..
this is not planned.
can say that the trip with them was quite pleasent =)
hehehe.
but i realised taht i talk too much.
opps !!
always lidat one !
but to say the truth, i am very very extream.
sometimes, i can be very silence when i met ppl on train, sometime e other way round.
not that i mood swing, but more of, if i am comfy or nt =)
but yeah, i dun like to be with big crowd.

was abit late for prayermeeting !!
i mus make it a point, i have to be punctual !!
cant walk fast due to this lousy sandals i am wearing.
i have to_____ my toe when i walk.
i seriously duno wat word to decribe my toes when i walk.
haha
gordon suggested "Gek" haha
i tik "Gek" is the best word to decribe my toe at the moment.
however, i still prefer to use a eng word to decribe it. lol.
but "Gek" is funny thou =p
i seriously tik that i can walk faster in heels compared to this sandals.
lol.

yay !!
won the best of e best fastest growing cg !!
hehehehehehee !!!!
back to jan, at that moment, fastest growing cg is nv nv in my dictionary.
mayb, fastest growing as in growing literally.
obese..... i mean.
ok lar joke.
actually, i am jus trying to say that, i'm reali supprise when i receive the sms frm eelee.lols
yea, jus wana say that...
the award dun jus belongs to me alone.
YOU GALS play a big role.
and, GOD play a big big role in this.
thanks for supporting me, both my spiritual daddy and children =)
i rmber a few years ago,i won the best of e best NB award.
that time i dun reali noe wats going on.
i rmber they gave me a mini-vase.
i was too practical that i threw it away after a few days.
lol
cos i dun grow flowers.
but regret throwing it away mann -_-
stupid me.

have one convert today !!
and and and, my NBs were holy spirit baptised !!
congrats =)

hmmmms.
i was blined by my limitations.
this leads to the lack of faith.
this leads to materialism.
being materialistic is not jus loving the things of the world more den God, but it also means that u trust wat u see, rather den trusting God.
currently, my grp have 14 ppl already.
hitting a unit is not a prob.
however, i have no faith in this, bcos i feel so in lack.
as in, not enough shepherds and leaders.
BUT, i wun tik this way again.
change my mind set.
y did i box God up?
y did i doubt?
if i am going to grow this grp with my own way, my own strategy, den how long can this grp exist?
victory not bcos of i am smart or something, its more of, God is working =)
okay, if i wana do great thing for God, the 1st step will be.. my God have to be a big God.
if i 'limit' wat god can do, den its so difficult for God to use me to do great things for His kingdom.
so.... this fri, i wana mit my gals and pray thru =)

today, daddy make me so sad again.
actually i tik its me lar.
i duno y leh.
i tik i am getting more demoralised abt my Os.
thou i rmber clearly that david told me e other nite when i am deciding if i wana re take Os r not, he said that once i made up my mind, dun turn back anymore.
i rmber this, and this is so significant to me.
this came in abit late, but thanks david =)
ok, as i was saying...
demoralised.
e reason being is when i read my past entries.
i said that i wana do well to glorify God.
but i failed my maths.
but i tik thats reali my best le.
a D7 might be lousy in many's eyes.
but to me, its not!!
thou i improve in a damn slow speed, but i did my best.
i noe that eelee understand, jency understand, some others understand..
but daddy, mummy and didi dun.
daddy say to eugene " ur jie jie lousy, take o level 2 times, if pass, i wun waste my money to send her to private sch"
mummy say to me " wat a disgrace, next year didi will go poly together with u."
didi says " if i got 24 points for Os, i will cry arh"
i noe that they didnt mean to hurt me, cos they love me.
but i am somehow hurt by their "indirect" speech.
and now, i start to tik, indeed 24 points is lousy.
i am very very scared to fail my maths again, i am so scared that i cant go poly again next year.
its a total bull shit to them when i said, " i did my best le"
u noe y i noe i did my best le?
cos even till now, i didnt regret at all, thou 24 points is not as good.
i am jus upset that they dun understand.

oh ya, i am so sinful !!
i ate supper with daddy jus now !
joyce & jens, pls forgive me!!
actually i dun wana go de, but daddy was so disappointed if i dun go.
pls understand that its VERY rare for us to eat together.
reali RARE.
the last time that we ate together was....... i tik chinese new year.
I THINK.
daddy is a BUSY man!! trust me.

okay lar, tired le.
buais.

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-06T01:44:00.000+08:00

i reali wana thank God for many things.
actually b4 i actually "pen it down" , i tot that a speedy post will do.
however, i highly suspect thats not going to happen !! wahaha

1st, i wana thank God that ii can control myself.
i reali thank the holy spirit that constantly remind me...
"are u sure? wat happen if u blurted it out? think 1st before u do anything..."
these are wat holy spirit has been telling me lately.
and yea, i saved alot of Unnesessary probz and also, i didnt hurt anyone =)
reali feel so blessed!!
thankiew holy spirit =)
anway talking abt this, i am reali angry.
haha.
or.... kinda diasppointed ba.
with this person, alot of truth to share to this person, however, its not the time yet, and i am pretty sure that it will be soon =)
however, i still love this person to bits =)

2nd, i wana thank God for my Nbs.
my Nbs, esp JIAHUI... grew alot alot alot le leh!!!!
i love u gals mann.
pardon me to say this, they are jus so naughty when i 1st saw them
feel like puuling my hair many many times. haha
but but but, now they are serious in God.
they reali did !
in cg, i saw them doing the devotions as told, testimony time, they reali shared how God bless them =)
i got this kind of "smile frm the depth of my heart" feeling when i tik abt it.
indeed, being a CL is like a mother. lols
i mus say this leh, its God leh.
reali.
I was like... "wow God, reali its u leh, God, u are jus too real..."
God lurves my care group =)
neh-neh-ni-poo-poo !!
=)

3rd, tml service, my conformation is 13 !!
praise the lord !
thou its exams times.
wahahahahaha...
wat jens say is rite, exams time doesnt mean we can have the excuses to hit low.
yupps.

4th, my 2 Nbs ask me if i can help them pray to receive holy spirit leh !!
argh !!!!!!!
i am mad i am mad !!
wahahahhahaahahahaha
i am reali touch for this desire of theirs, i blive God is DUPER touched as well !!

5th, today, i got to noe phoebe more =)
yea....
we had our shepherd and sheep's heart to heart talk.
wahahhaa
mayb still haben reach this stage lar.
but yea, i noe we are one step closer already =)
i love u sheep !!

6th, as i mentioned earlier, i have breakthru in my procrastination.
yupps.
i spent my time wisely le hor !!
however, there are still some areas that need breakthru lar =)
in Jesus name... amen !!
i shall overcome =)

7th, i emailed the transit-link company.
i told them that i wanted to apply a student ez link but i cant due to i am not a science student
wahahhaa
i even told them taht i am not working and i am taking accounts instead.
can i apply a student ez link?? =)
oh well, they replied !!!
but they didnt say anything, jus asked for my details.
have hope !!
GOD GOD GOD !!!!!!!!!!!!!
help me help me....
cos adult fare reali too ex le.
more den $150 per month.
God, i reali feel that i am a expensive child.
spend too too too much already !

8th, found a home for our hamster =)
$28.90 only.
other shop sell $33 plus
so ex.
hahaha
yeah.
actually its jia hui & xiao xuan's hamster.
but i help them take care.
they are jus so cute can??
they are as small as my thumb.
as in, same length as my thumb.. wahhahaa
so small eh.. hehe
they are hyper active and they love sun-flower seed !!
wahahaa
ya lar, all hamster are lidat..
my 1st time havin a hamster.
deprived rite? boo.
haha

hmmmms.
i tik my blessings are more or less lidat.
i seriously tik that there are more.
jus that i cant rmber.
when i do, i will update !! =p
yeah.

Unnesessary

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-05T02:23:00.000+08:00

This is wat i did for the seminar on tue..

its very interesting !! hahahahahaa

God image assessment

*The one that is underlined is my and, without underline is the question.. =)

1. God is my best fren,my listener,e one that i can rely on..

2. God is most happy with me when i spend time with him..

3. God is unhappy with me when i leave him alone

4. God is like my father bcos God pampers me like my dad did =)

5. God is like my mother bcos God longs to spend time with me like my mummy did =)

6. I feel God is very near =)

7. God is most proud of me for i perservered during tough times, i trusted him!

8. God feels distant from me when i procrastinate to spend time with him

9. In my life, God is most concern abt my relationship with him

10. If i could do one thing to please God, that one thing would be changing my attitude towards my dad

11. When i pray i feel secured, sometimes sleepy !! (hahahaha)

12. When i read the scriptures i feel that god is so amazing.. !!

13. The person who reminds me most of God is shuz & eelee..(kinda)

14. The thing that reminds me most of God is bible and his promises

15. One thing i would change abt my relationship with God is ... i hope our relationship will be very loving kind =)

16. God communicates to me thru ppl lor !! and also bible and prayers =)

17. God wants me to spend time with him

18. I am worried God will be disappointed with me

19. God likes to take care of me!

20. God becomes distant when i am stagnant

21. i regret ...... that sec 2 incident.. not suppose to be written down here !

22. the time i felt closest to god was when he spoke to me

23. sometimes god jus wana us to wait...

24. i want god to make his promises come to pass soon !

25. the main strength of my relationship with god is i always rely on him =)

26. the main weakness in my relationship with God is discipline myself to sit still and talk to him.. =(

27. i wish god would make me slimer!! (wahaha) and and and hug me =)

28. god expects me to do well in all aspects of my life

29. in my relationship with god, i want to increase my intimacy with him

30. god always watch over me =)

31. god thinks abt me when .....???? i tot every moment? haha

32. when i was a child, god seemed nth to me !

33. now, god seems to be my only strength

34. church is my home =)

35. i do not think god will mistreat me !!

36. i need god everyday !

37. god gets upsat when i made foolish decision

38. i want to understand god's patient, love and heart, how he think abt me

39. when i think of god i will ask him some questions !! wahaha

40. god feels happy when i made decisions for his sake, unhappy when u made foolish decisions

alrite, tahts e end. hehe

the blank is jus there for us to fill, no helping words !! wahahahaha

if u wan, u can do this =)

to see who God is to u =)

-tiinggx`charriis __* ii am ur beloved , ii am ur child-

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2006-05-04T01:18:00.000+08:00

this week has been a fruitful week for me.
thou thurs has barely started, but i feel so fruitful already.
the wonders of doing time schedule.
the wonders of not procrastinating.
the wonders of being discipline.
yeah, i feel so wonderful now =)

i can say that,i didnt reali waste alot of time !
i spent my time wisely...
and i feel so refreshed =)
have been so slack ever since my O has come to an end last year.
and and and, it cause stagnancy.
not a good feeling !

now i am always looking forward to do many many things =)
talking abt looking forward and joy...
jus now as i pray..
i told God that sometimes i dun reali look forward to do His work..
as in ministry...
sometimes cold, sometimes hot.
i was reminded abt Joy.
serving God with JOy !!
serving God is suppose to be joyful =)

thou we have to be responsible, however responsibilities should not be the one that drive us to serve..
its all abt love, passion and and and.....
ministry are meant to draw us closer to God,not the other way round =)
isnt that very true?

today, i dragggg my feet to the mrt station
i am super unwilling to go for accounts lesson.
hahahaha..
was late, cos have to mit jin qi to pass her guitar and i went out late. haha
actually today's lesson wasnt as boring cos i have eugene, my classmate sitting with me.
not my bro... haha.. its jus that they both have e same name .. wahaha
many funny incidents happen that makes the class less boriin.
4 hrs of accounts, can die !!
thanks eugene. haha

was actually thinkin if i should stop going for accounts class.
1st-its so borrin.
2nd-i noe many things le, jus need practice.
3rd-i wana work.
but i "called-off" this idea le..
1st- if i dun go poa class, i will not be discipline to study it.
2nd-joyce wun be that free to teach me.
3rd- its for my own good..
so so so so..... i will still go for class...
saddening, but i have to learn to give thanks !! haha

-a christian who neglects the holy spirit is like a lamp thats not plugged in-
hahaha.
thats Day 5 devotion !!
yea. =)
very very true.
amen =)

funny...
i was wearing a church camp tee jus now.
den my frenz say " u christian arh? "
den i was so shock, i tot why they noe sia...
den they simply say.....
" ur t-shirt tells me so...."
diao. haha
and and and, my pencil amused them !!
cos my pencil look reali like the wooden pencil that needs to sherpen every now & den, but its actually a mechanical pencil..
so eugene was puzzled and ask me.. " y are u still using this kind of pencil?"
den i show him the truth, he was super amuzed !
hahahahaha....
oh well, cute pencil =)
okay, i am crapping.
i do enjoy my day=) but yea, poa is BORRIN can?

camp is coming!
my nb dun seems keen to sign up.
God,How?
i reali dun wana them to miss out.
camp is such a wonderful time for us to be bonded, to noe u more, to have fun etc etc etc.
God, pls make a way =)
thankiew God.

tingg's application..
i wana be joyful in doing His ministry !
its a joy to serve God.
if u serve God with a =( face, it hurt God.
and also, u've missed out the joy of serving him.
lalalalala.

2006-05-03T03:03:00.000+08:00

today, i went to the seminar...
did the test...
was kinda supprise that to me, God is a "robber God"
initially i tot i didnt do the test properly...
but it somehow triggle in my heart and mind.
i kept thinking and thinking....
and when we were told to close our eyes to imagine wat is God's unloving image..
i thot to myself... it seems like i am restricted frm doing alot of things..
there is alot of things i wana do, but i didnt do, for God's sake.
but God is not a robber God!!
why on earth did i tot that i am short-changed?

i clearly noe that god is not sadist lar..
He is not that kind that loves to take away our fave and restrict this and that.
this may sound ridiculous...
but this can be identified in many's mind.

God reali bang me with His words big time.
its not abt giving up this & that for His sake.
Its more of, for OUR sake !
and also, its not a sacrifice, its abt choosing something better.
CHOSSING SOMETHING BETTER !!

God, i've hurt u haven i?
i criticised ur character unknowingly.
i didnt noe that i view u this way until today !!
i always thot that all these are jus little complains but actually i am insulting u =(

i read many blogs, or even heard ppl saying things like...
" i have to give up this, give up that "
den it followed by a "haiz" or the whole thing doesnt sound joyful at all.
i understand that we have to pay the cost when it comes to following Jesus.
and of cos, the cost is painful.
however, isnt this a beautiful thing?
when we watch romance show, when this guy gave up everything for that gal, our heart will melt.
but yea, God gave up His son for us, for love sake, doesnt this melt our heart as well?
when it comes to giving up things that are not reali significant in the Kog but kinda impt to u, u sigh.
oh God, sorry !

isnt God's grace amazing?
how is it possible to love someone that insult ur character greatly?
but yupps, to God, its possible.
He even goes the extra miles for us, He loves us !

so in conclusion..
paying the cost is something painful, however, its suppose to be a joyful experience.
cos when u obey God, God will nv short change u, and rather, giving u more!!
its not that u sacrifices, its more of choosing something better =)
its good that u sacrifices something u love for God, but yea, soon u will noe that its not a sacrifices but rather a blessing =)

no turning back.
if u have already let go, den y still dwell on it?
if u had already made ur mind to go all out for God, y be so calculative when it comes to decision making?

in God's hand, we will nv nv nv nv be in want.
cos God meets our needs.
God will not rob us.
he is not a joy-killer.
He will not short change us.
i reali regret for iewing God that way.
now, when it comes to decision making.
to give up or not... on certain things,
i will do it joyfully, willingly.
and trust that i am choosing something better, trust that i will not be short changed.
its a beautiful thing, isnt it?

-t |n g g ` c ha r i s __* I Will Trust As I Wait, For My God Is Never Late *__

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2006-05-02T13:54:00.000+08:00

Had a long day today... was so so tired !!
ytd went ah ma hse with mummy...
was so tempted to eat more !!
wahahaa
but ya, was on diet, so... =(
but yeah, i secretly ate one prawn... Opps !
was so angry with my uncles mann...
cos my uncle's gf pregnant, BUT they are still smoking there!
how can?? not good for a pregnant lady.
went mummy's hse to sleep.

cant sleep...
den i tik alot... hahahahha
i was thinking wat is one mistake that i cannot afford to make....
i tik and tik...
there are alot !!
one of them would be getting pregnant. haha
so funny rite?
cos i was thinking, if i am pregnant at this age, my future will be ruin mann !!
i tik i will go crazy, i will hide and not face anyone.
hahahahaha, silly me =)
but yeah, this wun happen to me =)

when i woke up, i am so shock to see my eyes!
was so swollen....!!
i look so ugly !!!
i was telling God...
"Heal my eyes!! i look so ugly !! "
wahahaha.
went walk walk with mummy...
yeah =)

met up with jens & joyce to go for the seminar.
hais, wana kill myself for this lousy attitude.
i dun look forward to this seminar at all, i kept telling jens that i feel like running away.
during praise time, God reminded me abt heart of expectancy.
cannot be so 'hack-care' , i am losing out... BIG TIME !
but yea, tml, i will go to e seminar with a great expectancy =)
i want God to speak to me thru this seminar =)

anyway, i learn quite alot today!
i tik that Mr Glendon is a good teacher =)
- no matter if we commit a mistake or not, God will still be close to us...
- Sometimes, We'll project how we feel on God.
EG: if we are disappointed with ourselves, we tend to tik that God is disappointed as well !! but thats not true right?
- the image of God is impt, if u tik that God hates u, its very unlikely of u to be positive towards life, on the other hand, if u tik that God goes crazy over u, its very unlikely for u to be so negative towards life. (chim??)
- healthy Guilt vs. unhealthy guilt.
healthy : guilty abt behavior, not self , will change to the better
unhealthy : guilty abt self, not only behavior, self condemn.
- realised that depression ppl forgot that life is suppose to be enjoyable
so, if u have a fren or someone close is depressed, do something that he / her enjoy most !

hmmms!!
jus a food for thot.
are we being sensitive to the ppl ard us?
nahs, not related to the seminar. jus a sudden thot. haha
for eg: when u heard abt pre-marital sex, u give that kind of face, some remarks like "eww" etc etc... but but but, have u ever wonder... wat if there is this person who face guilt bcos he / she have pre-marital sex and there is no one to turn to? if that person is ard u when u give that kind of face or remarks, would that person turn to u? wouldnt that person feel more rejected?
another eg: lesbians & gays.
if u openly criticise them... wat if there is this person who are facing this probz, who wanted to change and wanted to be help, but bcos of ur criticism, that person doesnt dare to seek help, wouldnt that person feel rejected?

i reali reali wana be careful with my speech, not that we keep quiet, but more of, no judgmental spirit is allowed =)
if not, who will come and seek help frm u?
as the church grow, we will see many many ex-drug addicts, rapist, 16-year old mother, les and gays etc etc etc.
its normal, i blive ppl who are in the right mind would want acceptance esp. after they did things that they, themselves find it hard to forgive.
but if we judge, make remarks or show that kind of face, they will not feel accepted.
u will nv noe, right?
these kind of ppl might be ard u, but its jus that u duno, so be sensitive, dun hurt ppl jus like that =)

ting is hungry!!
after the diet thing, it seems that i am always starved.
lols.

i feel sicky again!!!
headache arh =(

-t |n g g ` c ha r i s __* I Will Trust As I Wait, For My God Is Never Late *__

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2006-04-30T00:27:00.000+08:00

hey !!
u noe wat?

Ting is on DIET ! =)
wahahahahhaahahahahahahahahahahahaaa !

2006-04-28T23:58:00.000+08:00

alright, one convert today =)
when i noe abt it, i was like.... "Orh, yeah.."
cos when i receive the sms, i was shepherding jes, den didnt tik much..
haha
den on the train.......
i think & think...
i duno y i keep smiling to myself leh!
i cant help it !
haha

actually my cg is facing some probs..
noe that i shouldnt be too affected by it, cos miracles is coming.
in the midst of all these, God nv fail to bless
we have one convert !
wah...

rmber sometime ago, shirls say something like...
" its worth it, isnt it? "
cos she was super busy to prepare metamorphosis, but when she see one of e NB, badly desire for holy spirit, she tot to herself, all the hard work is worth it !!
and i tot so too =)

alot of things, i reali find it tough to handle..
many times, i dun feel like doing many things.
but to think abt it, wat i am doing for God cannot be compared with wat He has done.
and also, its worth doing all these.. yeah =)
one day, i will see all my Nbs being a shepherd.
when that day comes, i will surly say this to myself..
"thank God that we didnt give up!"
and for now, i will take care of them with God's strength
they are the future leaders in west !
=)

2006-04-28T00:00:00.000+08:00

Proverbs 29 : 11

A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.

2006-04-27T13:43:00.000+08:00

a few more mins to go!
and i am going for cg already =)
i reali pray that today's cg will be ministering to everyone, esp to the not connected ones.

i seriously tik that my life right now is too slack already.
i am always procrastinating !
Jesus, tell me wat to do??
there is alot of things to do in mind, but most of them are not yet done..
day by day, i always end my day with disappointment with myself.
i am reali upsat by me !! =(

i wana lead a exciting life.
not so stagnant, not so slack.
i wana be busy!!
actually i can one, the one that hinders me is myself.
also, i wana be a good example to e rest...
i wana be someone that when god look at me, he would smile.
and also, no more nonsense with him, i gotta guard my heart.

last night, i came before God.
i repented for not using my time wisely.
i reali duno wat to do leh....
i reali duno wat can i do in order not to procrastinate.
i tired lots of ways, but always fail !
but last night, God help me to realise that will-power alone is not enough.
in order to be a changed person, how is it possible to be done by will power alone?
thats y i always fail.
i was relieve that God assured me that i cant help myself.
haha
cos if he say that i can do it alone, i can confirm that i am going to fail him mann.
but God did not tell me that i can do it, infact he told me that i wun make it.
unless i attempted it together with him.
will-power is not enough.
amen =)

i reali dun wana cruise my days away.
i mus have a breakthruu in this !
God, help me!
enough is enough.
i dun jus wana be a jaw-bone.
that only noe how to say, duno how to do.
this kind of person is irritating isnt it?
all i need to to get up and do something.
hais, God help me.

2006-04-25T01:49:00.000+08:00

jus some pics..

i lurrve my shepherd!

nth better to do.....

its a mirror reflection!

at mrt... haha...

me & my sheep! u are impt to me =)

west female CLS... our 'david' smile!

jency look so greedy! haha...
friends for life =)

joyce and me!!
u are impt too!

my 1.53m back view,

2006-04-25T00:55:00.000+08:00

my two brothers!

my hubby =)

2006-04-24T11:57:00.000+08:00

Jus found this pic..
this pic reali look interesting!! hahaa
the crazy side of us =)

wahahahaha....
=)

2006-04-23T17:06:00.000+08:00

i reali thank God for favoring me =)
as i tik back, there are many many things that God has blessed me.
but many times, i didnt notice it.
jus like for example...
my cg, it was so terrible earlier on, but God change the situation.
i took some time to realise that...
that time i was like...
"eh? ya hor, our cg became so loving le hor??"
also, when i was healed many many times by God, i didnt realise until when someone reminded me or even God himself reminded me.
last week, i forgot abt the guitar, i was so panic...
keep calling & calling to ask if anyone have a guitar with them.
den finally when david found one, i was so relieve.
when i am supposed to share a blessing that God has given, i actually forgot abt this blessing!

oh my....
i have to learn to count God's blessings mann.
we have to grateful.
counting God's blessing is one way to refresh our soul.

hmmmms.
these days, God kinda turn my life around.
i have breakthrru in me! =)
was actually rejecting ppl to come into my life..
to be my frenz, as in, close frenz that can share life.
dun ask me y i am lidat, i also duno y!!
i jus find it hard to trust & also, to share deep...
so whenever i am at my lowest peak of life..
i felt very lonely, cos i have no one to turn to.
i always comfort myself by saying i have God.
haha
thats true lar! but i blive God places ppl ard me, he has his purpose!!

eelee was telling me to invest in a friendship.
den i gave a serious thought abt it & ya, i tried.
so, as i am trying, i can see that ppl ard me make efforts in building our friendship too!
thou i still have a prob sharing deep, but u noe wat?
when i am angry, hurt or something, i realise that i actually have a circle of ppl that are very ready to be my listening ear.
omg, y did i tik that i dun have frenz in e past?
i have frenz!
i have my close frenz =)
God reali help me alot.
and i can say, God provides.
now, i dun tik i will feel lonely when i am at my lowest peak of life, cos i noe not only i have God, i have ppl that are willing to go thru the darkest time of my life =)
for my part, i need to go extra miles to build a friendship.
And also, I realized that there are still many things that I haben let them noe, God pls give me courage to say! =)
not only sharing deep, but always seeking an opportunity to encourage each other.
hmmmms.
currently i have 4 frenz that i reali reali treasured.
they are jens, cindy, joyce and eelee =)

last fri...
went to jens hse to stay over.
i am reali reali very blessed.
and touch too.
finally!
i noe our friendship has deepen since den =)
i reali look forward to another stay over.
i haven feel this way for a long time already.
thankiew God !!!!

2006-04-21T03:32:00.000+08:00

argh, had a super long post & its gone again!
nvm, anyway...
jus wana tell u guys that the "others" in my blog rite, is no longer those archives le.
its canon in D in electric guitar!
very nice =)

anyway i lurve this webbie..

http://www.donghaeng.net/index-e.htm

thou many of u already noe of this webbie le..
but yea, the last time i went, cant view leh, now can le =)
actually, no harm watching again!
very nice =)

2006-04-20T00:48:00.000+08:00

Had a fruitful time with God last nite =)
read 3 caps of mark last nite...
this parable made me ponder and reali think abt it..
let me share with u...

3"Listen! A farmer went out to sow his seed. 4As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. 5Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. 6But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. 7Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants, so that they did not bear grain. 8Still other seed fell on good soil. It came up, grew and produced a crop, multiplying thirty, sixty, or even a hundred times."
[-mark 4 : 3-7-]

i stop here & wonder.....
"multiplying thirty, sixty, or even a hundred times?"
wow this sound so amazing!
hmmmms, how how how?
how to multiply?
wat is the good soil that can cause so much multiplication??
den i read on.......

14The farmer sows the word. 15Some people are like seed along the path, where the word is sown. As soon as they hear it, Satan comes and takes away the word that was sown in them. 16Others, like seed sown on rocky places, hear the word and at once receive it with joy. 17But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away. 18Still others, like seed sown among thorns, hear the word; 19but the worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things come in and choke the word, making it unfruitful. 20Others, like seed sown on good soil, hear the word, accept it, and produce a crop—thirty, sixty or even a hundred times what was sown."
[-mark 4: 14-20-]

amen & amen.
the conclusion made is..........
THE WORD OF GOD IS THE KEY.

got wat i am trying to say?

2006-04-19T23:52:00.000+08:00

today is the 19th.
i super love 19th...
cos its e day when i am born.. and the day that i noe jesus.
means, exactly 5 mths later is my 18th birthday and another exact 3 mths, its gonna be my 3rd spiritual bdae =)
yeah !!

went skool today.
wawawa...
i dun like wed cos i dun like accounts.
4 hrs in e class, with 5 mins break in between.
can die die die die.
hahahaha.
the gal beside slept so soundly....
only 7 ppl turn up & 2 of them was 2 hrs late for class.
so zai mann.
wahaha
but yea, i am not going to be lidat, wana be serious in studies mann

wow.
i am so refresh by god.
i have decided le.
i wana discipline myself!
i have no time management mann
okay, gonna discipline.
wana cut down on internet..
yes!
by 12 plus, i have to say bye bye to all msn ppl le.
wahaha

for God, i wana get out of my comfort zone.
this year, i blive is a year of growth for my personal walk with Jesus.
i either make it or break it.
i wana use this year to improve myself in many areas.
2006 gonna be a historical year for me.
a year of breakthrough.
2006 is more den jus re taking Os !
oh come on!

2006-04-18T23:51:00.000+08:00

hey ! pls go to this link.
damn nice =)

http://www.fathersloveletter.com/fllpreviewlarge.html

actually wana upload as pic de... but...................... nvm.
wahahaha
mus see k!!
abt God's letter to us =)

2006-04-14T02:13:00.000+08:00

today is a great day for me !
yeah.
had cg...
yeah, my gals always make my day =)
thanks gals.
yupps
hehes..

was so refresh today.
ya.
being with God's ppl is always e bestest.

argh. how?
i feel so afraid now.
shall not elaborate thou.
but ya.. God, help me !

anyway, jus wana take this time to affirm jes.
haha
she so cool lor.
she very enthu.
noe wat?
cos her NB cant go for metamorphosis cos orchard too far..
den she decided to hold a mcg on her own.
to invites her frenz & NBs.
they might watch passion of e christ too!
den after that mass invite to easter service.
wow... so touch.
i am so proud to have a sheep like her =)
how can not west a 2 grow with such excited ppl like her?
thank God mann !
=)
love ya sheep =)

she prepared HARD for the sushi mcg larr.
God, bless her.
God heal her too! she is sick =(
hehehe.
in jesus name, amen !

*ahems*
the rest of my sheep, dun jealous k
haha
noe that u guys work very hard le
but yes, come on.. work harder!!
trust in God larr.. lolx
we mus grow, we have to grow.. we WILL grow=)

2006-04-13T02:48:00.000+08:00

the greatest enemy is yourself.

Who am I,
that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I,
that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Who Am I,
that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who Am I,
that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

i'm sorry.
truely..

craviin for a fresh touch.
revial in my heart.
private breakthroughs leads to public breakthroughs.

procrastination is a sin.

2006-04-12T00:21:00.000+08:00

west a four does not exist anymore...
now our cg will be west A TWO =)
alright, other den the change of name part, there is not much diff lars =p

God..
revive this cg.

2006-04-10T02:09:00.000+08:00

i wonder, who am i to deserve all these goodness from God?
many times, when things dun go well, its so tough for me to give thanks.
but yes, come to tik abt it... did God short change me?

i remember asking God for converts.
and when God gave me converts... we rejoice!
ok so as all of us noe that converting is jus the begining...
and when they are so tough to be taken care of..
we complained.
God i repent =(

isnt that weird?
if we are so afraid of challenges, den y ask God for converts in e first place?
arent we the one that ask God for converts?
den y complain when we are given not 1 but 3?
oh well, stupid sinful nature.

yeah, i seriously agree that they are a bunch of tough ppl.
sometimes, i reali feel like screaming at them.
or even, heck care them.
but, isnt that stupid?
isnt that me who ask God for them to join the kingdom of light ?
not that i want them to remain lidat.
but yes, its a duh for NBs to behave this way.
as a spiritual "mother" extra miles is a must.
have u seen a mother being angry when the baby is crying or making a mess in her life?
no, i dun tik so.
when a mother decide to give birth to that baby, she shoud noe that taking care of a baby is more den feeding him / her milk daily.
its definelty more den that mann.

God, u are so faithful.
u gave us 3 NBs.
opps more den that, 7 NBs !
no more complains.
cos this is wat i asked for.
u put all these NBs under us, u have in mind that we can handle.
so yes God, we will do our best =)

who am i that God gave me all these?
who am i that the king of kings, the lord of lords that call me his beloved?
am i dumb or am i an idiot not to appreciate it & to hurt him over & over again.
am i stupid or no-brain for letting the tot of giving up enter my mind?
oh my God, i am so blessed.
He calls me His beloved.
i am a nobody, & he calls me his beloved.
how amazing is that?
how "un-real" is that?
but yea, its not a fairy tale..
is even more den a prince falling in love with cinderalla.
its even more amazing den that.

2006-04-07T01:45:00.001+08:00

my heart is beating fast.
dun reali noe how to interpret how i feel now..
in short, i dun reali like the way i feel now..

probably bcos i am too excited for sch tml..
probably bcos i was terrified jus now cos i tot i cant take my Os, & tml i have to go POST to pay the fees. very scared that i something crop up & i cant pay tml, if i cant manage to pay by tml, thats it. bye bye to O level. (pray pray)
probably bcos i kana put aeroplane again.. alright, getting used to it soon..
probably bcos of confirmation. quite lousy..
but i noe, that is not e end of e world, dun give up =)
probably bcos i am desperate of retaining all my NBs, but it seems tougher & tougher..
lets not give up.
probably bcos i juz watch "the series of unfortunate events" & it somehow stir my emotions.. (but this is highly impossible) the show is abit dry & bored can?

failure is not when things dun go well,
failure is when u give up.

oh well, to tik abt it.
wat is it that God cannot do?
my God is a powerful God.
My God is e Lord of the impossibles.
my God is e Lord of miracles.
my God is e lord of west a 4
my God is e Lord of jocasta,madeline & xiu jin.
my God is e Lord of jia min jing ting step & jane
my God is e Lord of cindy phoebe & jes
my God is e lord is e Lord that longs to bless us.
My God is e very same God that can grow the mustard seed into a huge tree.

in e bible, there are so many miracles.
if it can happen in the OT, in the acts church.
why cant it happen NOW,HERE in West?
hur !

okay, enough is enough.

lets not give up =)
do our best & God will do e rest.
lets give our 101 % to retain all of them !
no discouragements allowed, no time for that.

the time invested.
the time spent on extra miles.
the time spent on waiting,
the time spent on phone.
the time spent on sms
IS NOT A WASTE.
the things we are doing now, its not a waste of time
we are doing this for a purpose, doing this for God =)

jia you west a 4
jia you jes
jia you cindy
jia you phoebe
jia you ting.

lets not give up, focus on God.
yes!

2006-04-06T01:54:00.000+08:00

went to new skool to reg.
was expecting a few peeps in e room, but i went in e wrong time
it was breaktime, therefore... i saw alot of the students there.
oh well, glad to say that they were quite friendly=)

wanted a morning slot, but end up, i got an afternoon slot.
initially wasnt too happy abt it, wanted to jus smile & go off, cos if i take e afternoon slot, how to do ministry??
but when i see e timetable, i dun reali wan to change to morning slot le..
whahahaha...
cos its only until 2pm.
some more dun need to wake up so early..
means, the previous post abt waking up 5.30 is not valid anymore!
yeah ! =)
not bad lar.

basically, everyday study till 2pm..
except for wed & fri ..
wed till 5.30pm & fri till 7.30pm.
thurs no lesson..

eh? y am i reporting my schedule on blog?
hahahahhaa...
nvm lars.

met up with my old frenz today.
haha
my fren told me that her sis ask her a question...
" why is there so many "gods" around?? y got so many religions?"
when she told me this, i was abit shock.
hahahaha...
cos there is actually ppl that wonder abt this.
oh well, duh.
i wana mit her sis mann, den i can tell her that there is actually only ONE God.
hmmmms !

actually its quite tough to take care of NBs isnt it?
as wat many ppl says, its like taking care of babies.
which i seriously tik so too!
but u noe wat?
to retain all e NBs is a must!
cannot give up cos...
1st- they are precious to God.
2nd- They are precious to God
3rd- They are precious to God...
4th- They need God
5th- they need God
6th- they need God
haha
ok lar enough..
dun wana give up is cos i dun wana miss out the process.
also, they are reali precious.
precious things is nv easy to handle, they always need extra care, extra protection, extra attention, extra... blah blah blah.

a unit in west a 4 !!
oh come on .

oh btw
i hate my hair mann !
argh =(

2006-04-05T00:16:00.000+08:00

its normal to hit goal...
its unusual if didnt hit goal.
isnt that true??

God, i am so sick of being unusual.
could u please do something abt it?
come on God, let me experience wat is it like not to miss Goal.
let hitting goal to be norm in west a 4.

tell me!
tell me wat is wrong??
its time to bear fruit.
its time to grow.

God, take a look.
look at these ppl.
they need u lord!
God, use us, use us to bring them into ur kingdom.
God, would u please use us!

i reali thank God that e ppl in my cg are excited to see growth.
we are all looking forward!
God, tell us, wat is it that we lack..
please...... argh.

its when we wana do great things for the lord, we experience him 1st hand.
its when we step out of e boat & take e challenge to walk on water...
we experience storms....
its when we experience storm, we grow.
and also, experience jesus, a personal encounter with Him=)

God................
i dun rmber when is that last time that i ever hit my goal.
make it tgis week God !
okay?

pray pray pray.
God love this cg more den i do.
i blive He is more kan jiong den me.
hahahaha.
commit this into ur hand.

2006-04-04T00:57:00.000+08:00

*Drum Roll.............*

Ting is going back to skool !

not jurong sec but Penciltutor school.
eh? i juz realised that, its pencil-tutor..
hahahahaha.... the name of e skool sound stupid, but when the 2 words come together, it look so pro.
oh well...
at yishun....
7.30am start lesson...
means.......
ard 6.30am have to take train le
cos i tik still have to take bus frm yishun mrt, I THINK
means..... 6.15am have to be at bus stop...
means... 5.30am have to wake up!!!! (provided that i dun slack too long on bed)

ARGH......... early early early early.

but i am a bit excited.
yeah, i dun need to rot at hm le!
=)

i hope i can get in...
going to reg tml.
God please .....

i have a sudden wish.
how i wish............
i can drive.
den i can wake up later le.
hahahaha
but mission impossible
alrite, back to earth..
ting shall wake up at 5.30am & take MRT.

wahahahahahhahaaha......

2006-04-03T01:35:00.000+08:00

I WILL TRUST AS I WAIT, FOR MY GOD IS NEVER LATE

dun exactly rmber where i "kope"this pic from.. but yay, this has been a blessing to me =)

serving God cannot be a routine!

its not juz abt working & working non stop.

we tend to fall into e trap of being a working machine & forgetting why we are doing wat we are doing.

its impt to noe why u are doing wat u are doing.

if u tik serving God is a routine, den i guess u have miss out alot !!

Show the world that Jesus live...

i reali tik life transformation is e best prove that Jesus is alive.

i tik its reali impt to check our life...

are we leading a life that show others that Jesus is alive?

how often did u complain? how do u react when things dun go well? wat is the topic when u are chatting with ya frenz? who are u when u are alone? who r u when there is no spiritual person ard u? how often did u lost ur temper? is ur life a joyful one? and and and... how often did u announce to e world that u are sad etc?wats ur msn nick(depressed, heart broke, etc etc?)

haiz, sometimes, our life reali dun prove that jesus is alive.

come on, be different !

lets not go ard & show that bitter face, let our life show that Jesus live.

start to be aware of ur "image" .

let ppl noe that jesus is alive.

the way u react, ur speech, the joy level gotta be different.

be positive when things dun go well, cos we have Jesus =)

2006-04-02T00:53:00.000+08:00

its always easier said den done.
oh well, i will raise both of my hands in agreement..
(hmmmm.... raising both of my legs as well)
i am very convicted abt doing the rite thing despite how u feel, coz we cannot do the work of God base on feelings, we cannot make decisions due to feelings, we cannot due to feelings, push all responsibilities aside & ignore.
bcoz feelings go up & down.
esp when we are emotional, the things we do, the decisions we made, tend to be stupid.
and of cos, causing us to regret in the near future.

all these, is wat i always repete myself in cg, in shepherding, in dmm & even normal chattings.
but but but...
when it happens to me, i seriously find it tough to do the rite thing despite how i feel.

dun reali feel good for the past few days.
kept tearing, haiz.....
in my mind, i clearly noe that i cannot allow emotions to affect me.
but it is reali affecting me despite how i try to avoid it.
i keep meeting ppl up trying to keep myself occupied.
but ya lar, its dumb.

den den den den....
alot of "dun feel like" ..
shall not elaborate thou.
so many times, i have do the rite things.
and at that moment, it doesnt feel good to do e rite thing!
i noe wat are e rite things to do...
if u ask me, i can even list them down.
thats y, i have to make a decision...
to do e rite thing or to nurse the emotions.

haiz, i reali very sad.

but i thank God for being so so faithful.
God is juz so tangible.
as in, at e end, i still did wat is rite.
didnt wana submit to my feelings cos God is constanly reminding me.
God is always there chit-chatting with me.
i ask him alot of times, "wat should i do?"
or... "God, pls understand, i am not feeling good,can i not do it?"
den when God ans me... "do wat is rite.." i will cry... haha
sounds funny rite?
cos i was reali reluctant.

here comes the blessings..
after obeying God, i realised alot.
realised that 'she & she' can be my frenz.
shall not say their names =p
i wana invest in building friendship with them =)
i reali want.
its not easy to be a fren.
trust me.
but i want to =)

ii duno how to say.
this time when i tell my ppl or any other person abt doing wat is rite despite feelings, i guess i can tell them with much more conviction.
cos i experience that.
i noe how tough it gonna be & i experience blessings!

e blessings are more den juz the fren part.
its that, i appreciate God more, my relationship with him grew to another level le... =)
i heard this sentence 2 times...
"hey, u gotta grow up, u gotta be mature.."
haiz, i want to..
reali.
i want to get out of that little gal in me.

face the music.
this is the term rite?
its challenging.
have to be humble, gotta have self-control & courage.
i cant avoid this forever rite?
come on ting, u have God!

all in all...
i juz wana say that, i reali wana please God..
i reali want to.

do wat is rite despite how u feel.
easy? nahz!
but it pleases God & also, u will surly not regret.

ting... could u please juz grow up?

okay btw....
i reali tik that my 3 sheep are God's gift to me.
today so sad lar, hit 5 for service...
i was like... "hello... i tot our goal is 12?"
was so discourage....
i blive my gals are too.

den juz now, my gals ask me to call them to conference.
they start evaluating & planning wat to do next week.
i was reali touch lar.
reali.

thank god that they have ownership for this grp.
i am not e only one working.
gals, i reali love u to bits!
sometimes, i reali feel that we are more like frenz.
love u gals not only cos u all work hard lar, but more of... i tik its reali God eh...
not cliche ok!!
but its reali God that bring us together & west A 4 is juz like our home =)
as in... mayb there will be down times ba, no no, there WILL be down times, but i blive all these wun change the fact that we are united, we are so loving.
wahahahahahahahaha!!!!

i love u sheep.
phoebe, jes & cindy =)

2006-03-30T02:40:00.000+08:00

Ting & Gordon on msn.....

ting: how's today's mcg??
gordo: wasted..
ting: huh..why?
gordo: got 2 nb come only..
ting: wat abt non b?
gordo: contacts all put aeroplane
ting: diao...
gordo: sian diao lor..
ting: this kind of ppl are the most irritating kind...
gordo: apparantly they make up a large portion of society..
ting: wahaha, irritating, not responsible !
gordo: i wonder wat sesame street is teaching them
ting: DIAO, okay i tik u are sleepy....

hur!!!
noe y ??
i tik its true eh, y ppl are getting worse??
i rmber my hope sem tcher say ppl are degrading.
i juz cant digest the fact that putting aeroplane is jus so normal..
argh.... thats so rude lar..
cos ppl who put aeroplane simply dun respect that poor fren who waited for them, or rather.. "dun put them in their eye" (translate in chi)
qi si wo le !

wahaha, i feel so much.. cos recently i always kana put aeroplane.
hmmmm oh well.
not abt NB is lidat.. but i am thinking, its character prob eh...
i reali hope that they dun treat their frenz this way mann..

okay God, since i say i wana go extra miles...
i have to learn to digest the fact that putting aeroplane is so so normal.
feel like screaming mann.
wahahaha..

tml cg!
i am the guitarist again!
wahahaha
i tik God is graceful mann.
God, help me k?
my guitar skill is kept within west a 4.
dear cg members, pls dun talk abt me playing guitar in public place ok.
its a disgrace.
wahahahahaha......

My goal...
to RETAIN all my NBs.
HELP ME LORD.

2006-03-28T02:11:00.001+08:00

lolx... this is the 3rd post for today liaoz...
juz finish my QT.
i am so refresh.
i reali wana share this blessing mann..

was actually asking God if HE could show me wat it will be like when west a4 become a unit.
for the past few days, God didnt show me...
den i was telling God that i reali wana see how west a 4 will look like when we hit a unit size.
i juz wana be encouraged & motivated.
but... i saw nth...

today, i didnt pray that prayer...
i ask God to speak to me.
i ask God to help me to perservere..
coz i noe myself, when i pray for a certain period of time, i will lose my concentration & start to be distracted.
so i wana be patient & wait for him to speak.

When i start to ask God again...
"God, show me wat it will be like when west a 4 hit a unit size, show me!!"
den again i see nth..
den i ask God.. "y is it when i ask u this, all i see it darkness?"
"does this means that a unit in west a 4 wun come to pass? but i tot its ur will to be fruitful?? GOD!!"
den God show me myself walking...
every one step i take, one light bulb lights up...
i only can see my 2nd step when i took my 1st, saw my 3rd step only when i took my 2nd, saw the 4th step only when i took e 3rd step & the list goes on...

den i understand le..
God ask me to take faith to walk every step.
coz i tend to fear when i had to take a step forward, to take up new challenges.
God is smart, He wun show me how it will look like to have a unit size.
he is basically telling me this..
"u will noe how a unit size in west a 4 look like when u take the step forward.."
this reminds me of abraham..
God told him to go to a land and he will show him.
means abraham will reach the land, even thou he duno where is it, as long as he follow God, den he will reach the destination.
oh well, do u understand wat i am trying to say?
haiz, i tik i am lousy in expressing this in words mann.

this is the word given to me.
"WALK BY FAITH & NOT BY SIGHT"

okay, will not ask God to show me le...
i will take up His challenges & walk by faith.
allowing him to guide me.
as i walk, i blive i am walking towards victory =)